Whoo-hoo, road trip! It's time for Super Special #14, BSC in the USA! This is going to be a fun one, so buckle up! (Haha, get it?) So the BSC girls are splitting into two groups (with some other people who are related to a coupe of them) and going on a road trip across the USA. One group is going across the northern U.S. and the other group is going across the southern part. The tag line on the back of the book says, "From Stoneybrook to Palo City, it's 3,000 miles of fun, friends, and adventures!" Personally, I would have made it "From Connecticut to California..." to give it that nice alliteration, but I'm a fan of alliteration, what can I say? (That's probably why my movie blog is called Cinematic Sara).
Why are the girls going on a cross-country road trip? Well, let me explain how it all happens. Dawn and Jeff are in Stoneybrook for the summer, but Jack wants to fly to Stoneybrook two weeks earlier and take them back in an RV. He has an art dealer friend from New York (it would make more sense if this was Carol's friend since she's an artist, but whatever) who's moving to L.A. This guy has an RV and Jack has volunteered to drive it to California for him. Why the fuck anyone would want to drive a big, honking' RV across the country is beyond me. Look, I've never ridden an an RV and I know people who have them and love them, but I would hate to drive something that big. Why isn't Mr. Choi, Jack's friend, driving the RV himself, you ask? Because he doesn't have time. Jack thinks this will be the perfect opportunity to take Dawn and Jeff across the country in the RV. Personally, I think this is a huge dick move. He's cutting their stay short with their mother by two weeks and he has permanent custody of these kids. He has all the time to spend with them and Sharon only really gets to see them during the summer (as long as they're not going to Hawaii or on road trips!) or holidays.
Dawn mentions this to the BSC members and OF COURSE Watson wants to do the same thing too. He plans to cancel the original vacation plans his family had so he can rent an RV and take (most of) his family across the country. I'm dying to know what the original plans for their family vacation were. Because I would be pissed if I were going somewhere cool/relaxing with my family and instead had to go on a two week road trip across America in an RV with my whole family. Ugh, no thank you. Oh, and of course he invites all of Kristy's friends, but none of his other kids are allowed to bring friends! Guess Karen and David Michael should feel lucky they were allowed to invite friends when they went to Shadow Lake. Also, this reminds me of the time when Mr. Pike wins that trip to the Bahamas and Disney World and of course Watson has to take his family too! Stop flaunting your wealth, you obnoxious millionaire! But because there are so many people in the Brewer RV, most of the other girls go with Jack, Dawn, and Jeff. Everyone gets to pick out one place they get to visit.
In the Northern Route RV we have:
It is mentioned that this is Jack's first time in Stoneybrook which is surprising to me. He was married to Sharon for at least 12 years and never came to Stoneybrook with her to visit her parents? Did Sharon just visit Stoneybrook by herself when she was married to Jack? Did her parents always visit her in California? It is also mentioned that this is Jack's and Richard's first time meeting each other (awkward!), and yeah, that makes sense.
Okay, before we jump into everybody's storyline, let's take a look at the cover:
Kristy gets the second chapter where we get the obligatory introduction to everyone in the BSC and she tells us who is going in what RV and where everyone wants to go. She won't get another chapter until chapter 22, however her presence is felt throughout the entire book since they go to so many damn stadiums! They go to Jacob Fields in Cleveland (which is now called Progressive Field (I know because I Googled it)), Wrigley Field in Chicago, the stadium in Detroit, the stadium in Milwaukee, the Metrodome in Minneapolis (I've been there!), the Kingdome in Seattle, and Candlestick Park in San Fransisco. And God knows if they went to any other ones! That's seven stadiums! And if that's not bad enough they go to games to at least four of them. It's possible they went to more but weren't mentioned. Stacey, Claudia, Mary Anne, and Dawn don't even like baseball and hate going to the games (and I don't blame them!) I could understand going to ONE baseball stadium and seeing a game. It is absolutely ridiculous that Kristy gets to go to all these stadiums while everyone else just gets to pick one place. If I were Claudia, I'd want to go to other art museums.
Towards the end of their trip, when they're at a game at Candlestick Park, the JumboTron is showing images of people in the stadium and who does Kristy and Mary Anne see on the screen? It's Kristy's biological dad with some woman. I mean, really, what are the odds of that? Kristy had mentioned that the last time she heard from her dad, the card was postmarked from Sausalito, so he's close to San Francisco. She also mentions that she had always wanted to visit a bunch of ballparks with him, but that never happened. The other girls are all for her trying to find him, but she's not sure. Which makes sense since he did walk out on his family and hasn't really kept in touch. If Kristy doesn't want to see him, then her friends shouldn't pressure her into it. Mary Anne tells her she has to look for him or she'll regret it (will she? really?), so Kristy agrees. They reference the time he came to Stoneybrook with that "sneak visit of his." They're referring to the movie, right? Have the books ever referred to the movie? I thought that was interesting. Kristy manages to find him and he's nice to her, but that's probably because he's there with his girlfriend, plus Kristy's friends and thousands of people are all around. We get this exchange from them:
"Aren't you going to ask how Mom is?" The words just flew out. I couldn't stop myself. "Or Charlie or Sam or David Michael?"
"Are they here too?"
"No. Just me."
Dad let out a low whistle. "I wish I could see them."
"Me, too. You could visit. The Brewers. Remember? McLelland Road."
"Sure. I'd like to." Dad pulled a pen and a slip of paper out of his pocket and scribbled something on it. Here's my address."
Yeah, my bs radar is going off. Patrick doesn't care that the others aren't there and he has no desire to visit them. And Elizabeth wouldn't want that either. Kristy asks him to keep in touch and he does send a postcard, but Kristy sends all sorts of shade to him asking him if he can send an actual letter the next time he writes.
Claudia packs two down jackets "because you never know how cold it'll be." She claims this is because they'll be going north. True, the north doesn't get as hot as the south...but down jackets in summer? And two of them?? (One is for casual wear, the other is more dressed up). WTF is she thinking? She is talked out of packing them. She talks about how when they first started the trip, "the RV seemed like a house on wheels", but "somewhere outside of Connecticut the house seemed to start shrinking." Yikes, that didn't take very long! But I think it's realistic that for such a long trip, that was inevitably going to happen. It's too bad for Claudia it happened so soon! She talks about the boredom she endures and how she can take so much of playing cards or Twenty Questions and can't sketch the scenery because they're driving by so fast. Nobody really talks about the bathroom situation (although there is a scene where Dawn and Jeff are fighting over it), but one bathroom and seven people? Phyllis Nefler would say they were roughing it and she would be right!
Claudia comments:
During the trip, I discovered a lot of unexpected things about my friends. For instance, I had no idea that Kristy likes to wash her hair with soap to "save time" (I nearly fainted). Or that Jeff eats peanut-butter-and-tuna-fish sandwiches. Or that Dawn's organic apples sometimes have worms, which I found out the hard way.
What the fuck? Claudia nearly faints because of Kristy using soap on her hair, but doesn't faint when she bites into an apple with a fucking worm in it? Get your priorities straight, Claud! Also, I'm confused about the washing hair with soap...is this a bar of soap? And how doe that save time? Why not just wear a shower cap and wash your hair every few days or so? Jeff's sandwich sounds absolutely disgusting.
Jeff is such a brat. I'm surprised I'm even saying this, but he might even be worse than Karen in this. When he found out they're going to the Art Institute, he whines about it. Shut up, Jeff. Everyone gets one pick (except Kristy, apparently) and this was Claudia's pick.
Claudia sees a spiral notebook she thinks might be hers since she brought a few along, but it doesn't look familiar to her. She opens it up and sees it belongs to Stacey. Stacey sees this and is FURIOUS that Claudia is reading it. And really, Claudia doesn't see anything scandalous. All she sees is that Stacey wrote about going to another baseball stadium in Detroit and she ate yummy Greek food and bought some earrings. NBD, right? Well, from Stacey's reaction, I'm guessing there must be some JUICY stuff in her diary and I'm dying to know what it is! She's so mad that she won't talk to Claudia again until almost the end of the trip and if she does say something to her, it's only her saying something snide to Claud. I am 100% on Claud's side here. She did nothing wrong. Stacey is just acting like a bitch.
Before Chicago, they went to Cleveland where they went to the Rock and Roll Hame of Fame. We only learn about it from Claudia's journal entry where she writes "The Rockin Role Hall of fame was grate." She thinks that since they didn't have U4Me or "Blaid" (is that supposed to be Blade?), it must be because they're too new. I've never heard of Blaid/Blade in the BSC Universe (the BSCU?), but I suspect they're a made up group like U4Me. I also suspect they're probably pop.
In her journal, Claud also writes that she "thot the mid west was all close together?" WTF? Has she even seen a map of the U.S.? The Midwest states are much bigger than the New England ones she's used to. Also, Claudia doesn't know the difference between Wrigley Field and Marshall Field. She just knows one's a baseball park and the other's a department store. Even if you're not a baseball fan, you've probably heard of Wrigley Field.
Later on, they'll go to the Wall Drug Store in South Dakota where Claudia finds a sketch that reminds her of something Georgia O'Keeffe would have drawn. The guy only charges her $1 for it which is a great deal because later on, she'll find out it WAS actually sketched by O'Keeffe! She finds this out when they reach Palo City and Mr. Choi (Jack's art dealer friend, if you remember) offers to pay her $500 for it. He does explain that if it were a painting, it would be worth more, but $500 for an authentic Georgia O'Keeffe sketch still seems a little on the low side. Even in 1997. She ends up keeping the sketch. I thought she might try to sell it for more money, but no, she hangs it up in her room because it makes her "feel so inspirred." Claudia writes a note to Mr. Choi and it always makes me cringe when she writes to someone she just met, especially if they're an adult because her spelling is so atrocious! She spells sketch as "scetch"; conversation as "conversasion", thought as "thot"; and feeling as "feling." (My spell check doesn't like Claudia's spelling either, it always wants to revert back to the correct spelling!)
After visiting Chicago, Mary Anne calls her grandma, Verna, to tell her they're going to be a day late because there was so much to do in Chicago. I knew this was going to happen! There's no way they can go to all their scheduled stops (not to mention Kristy has ten of them!!), plus all the extra stops they make and get to Palo City in two weeks! No way! But before they go to Maynard, they have to go to Milwaukee and Minneapolis because Kristy has to see the baseball stadiums there. Seriously, why couldn't Kirsty wait to go on this baseball park journey of hers when she was older and didn't have to drag along people who don't give a rat's ass about baseball to all these stadiums?
Verna tells her that since there are painters at her house, she'll come to to meet her in Minnesota and they can meet in Bloomington. I had to chuckle when she said this because Mary Anne had just been telling us that she was getting tired of malls and ballparks. I can understand the ballparks, but I didn't realize they were going to so many malls! Of course, Bloomington is the home to the Mall of America. When Verna reveals this to Mary Anne, she's saying it as though Mary Anne would have never heard of it:
"It's called the Mall of America, " Grandma continued. "Meet me at the entrance to Camp Snoopy."
I could feel the blood draining from my face. "A mall?"
"The biggest and best you've ever seen."
See, that exchange seems like Mary Anne doesn't know what the Mall of America even is. It opened in 1992, so it' been open for five years by this point. It kind of surprises me that Mary Anne has never even heard of the Mall of America. Maybe it's because she's in the East Coast. I am from the Midwest and I have been to the MoA at least ten times. This is because my brother used to live in Minnesota for quite awhile (Edina, and most recently, Stillwater) so I've always just known about it. Mary Anne isn't thrilled about the prospect of going to another mall, but agrees because Verna is adamant about it.
It turns out that Mary Anne thinks the MoA is "pretty cool" (hellz yeah, it is!) and they go to Camp Snoopy and ride all the rides, Ha, I remember the last time I went to the MoA (about six years ago) and was so disappointed that the amusement park was no longer called Camp Snoopy. It had some other non-catchy name. I love the roller coaster. It's not scary at all, but still quite fun.
Throughout the trip, there has been some tension between Mary Anne and Jack. He's been saying snide comments about Richard. Before they go to Chicago, Mary Anne comments that her dad often goes there for business trips and Jack says it must be nice to wine and dine on the expense account and how all his lawyer friends are workaholics and don't have time with their families. When they have lunch at a health food restaurant (Dawn's idea, of course) at the MoA, Mary Anne makes a face at whatever she's eating and Jack says, "Used to that heavy red-meat diet, huh?" and says "Old Richard seems like a meat-and-potatoes guy." Mary Anne says he only eats that once or twice a week, which seems pretty normal to me. Verna, bless her, tells Jack:
"My son-in-law eats very, very well, In fact, judging from that little belly of yours, you could take a tip from him!"
OOH, BURN!!!! That was awesome. I love Verna. I wish she was my Grandma.
I have to wonder if Jack is giving Mary Anne a hard time about her dad because he still has feelings for Sharon and resents Richard for marrying her? I know, I know, there's a lot to unpack there. Now if Jack wasn't re-married to Carol by now, I would have just assumed he was mad that Sharon got re-married before he did and was taking out that resentment on Mary Anne, but that fact that her IS currently married makes me think he's doing this because he still has feelings for Sharon. He's not mean to her, per se, but he will lightly poke fun of her (or Stoneybrook or Richard). Mary Anne will confront Jack about this later and Jack apologies and everything is great, much like everything always is whenever a BSC member confronts an adult.
Dawn is super obnoxious about other people eating meat. I can't quite pinpoint when this will start in the series, but by the time she moves back to California, a monster has been created. When they go see a game in Milwaukee, she lectures a vendor who's selling bratwurst and calls it "stuffed animal entrails." Dawn, STFU and leave the poor guy alone. He's just doing his job. Then, when they go to the health food restaurant at the MoA, she MAKES the others order "succulent sautéed seitan cutlets." Seitan is wheat gluten and suppose to taste like steak, but Mary Anne tells us it doesn't. That sounds nasty. I actually have no problem with vegetarian dishes. When I get my three Hello Fresh meals, usually one or two of them are vegetarian meals becuase I think they're pretty tasty (and I'm not a vegetarian...but I don't eat a lot of red meat..I very rarely have red meat...Dawn would be proud!) Speaking of red meat, Dawn asks Mary Anne if she's gone back to it since she left Stoneybrook. I don't even remember Mary Anne saying she was going to stop eating red meat, but maybe I just don't recall when that happened.
When both RVs reach the Schafer home in Palo City, Watson has bought some cold cuts for everyone (which includes the other members of the We Love Kids Club) and Dawn is freaking out about "processed dead pig slabs!" One of the other WLKC girls is all, "Eww! Lunch meat!" And she says that in front of Watson who thinks they aren't fresh. OMG, STFU, you inconsiderate, spoiled girls. He was just trying to do something nice and there are people at this shindig who do like deli meat and if you brats don't like it, then eat all the other healthy choices like hummus or fruit! Ugh!!!!
Okay, let's rewind and go back to the road trip. After Minnesota, they find themselves in South Dakota and Jeff wants to go to Mammoth Site (apparently he gets to go to more than one place too!) and everyone agrees to go there (instead of Mount Rushmore). Dawn says to reach it, they have to drive across there entire state. Um, don't they have to drive across the entire state anyway if they're going to California. You guys want to go west! Unless they were planning another way to get to Cali? I'm very confused.
Jack must be an idiot because he runs out of gas and they're in the Middle of Nowhere, USA. Now I'm pretty sure when you're in those rural areas, they tell you at the last town you're at that there are no gas stops/ bathrooms/ food anyway until the next ____ miles, especially if it's going to be awhile before you reach one. So why didn't Jack gas up? He manages to flag down another car that passes by with parents and two kids inside and he's going to hitch a ride with them back from where they came from to find some help. Now he does tell them to lock the RV and flag down a state trooper if they see one, but this seems like a start to a horror movie where the serial killer is looking for his next victim(s). The girls seem to be more concerned about the wildlife. I'm not really sure what else Jack can do (besides having gassed up in the first place!)
When the sun starts to go down, they hear a coyote howling and Dawn thinks they should feed him so he'll quiet down. She also claims she thinks coyotes are vegetarians. Is she joking? What is her school in California teaching her? Jack comes back with a policer escort and they are able to continue their trip and after that Jack always gasses up at every town they stop in even if he doesn't need to.
After going to Yellowstone AND Grand Teton National Parks (again, how do they find the time to do all of this??) they're in Idaho and still haven't found any ghosts towns to visit for Dawn's destination. Really? No ghost towns in South Dakota, Wyoming, Montana, or Idaho? O-kay.
When they're at a rest stop near Boise, they see a bunch of brochures for attractions (I presume they're near Boise since one of them is for the Boise zoo) and of course Dawn is bitching about what a waste of paper all those brochures are. But she does find something she thinks might be fun: "Buzzard Gulch - Idaho's Turn-of-the Century Haunted Village, Lovingly Recreated for Today's Visitor." Now any idiot can clearly tell this is a fun, touristy destination and not a "real, live ghost town" like Dawn thinks. She's super embarrassed about the whole thing, but everyone else thinks it's fun and have a good time and finally, so does Dawn. I wonder if ghost writer Peter Lerangis didn't think he could think of a storyline with a ghost town, so he opted for this option instead?
I love when they go to Seattle because I've been there three times, so it was fun to see them visit a city I've been to. (I have also been to Chicago, but it was a long time ago and they didn't go to any of the places I went to). I've done the checklist of all the things Stacey says everyone wants to do. Jeff wants to go to the Space Needle? Been there twice. Mary Anne wants to ride the monorail? Yep, been on that. Dawns wants to check out the Pike Place Market (guess she doesn't care about fish!) Been there. The only things I haven't done are go to a Mariners game (Kristys' choice, what a shock!) or shake Bill Gate's hand (I'm guessing Jack was joking about that). I'm surprised nobody wanted to go to the first Starbucks. I've never been inside, but I have seen it...there was a LONG-ass line out the door.
Stacey is supposed to meet Ethan at the Corner Coffee Shop at noon. Whether or not you have been to Seattle, you probably know it's known for it's MANY coffee shops. There is one on every corner. I still laugh when I think about the first time I visited Seattle and the first thing I saw at the airport when I got off the plane was a Starbucks. The only thing Stacey knows about its location is that it's near "some park" (which Seattle has many of!) and she thought she wrote down the address, but apparently she only wrote that it was "near Third Avenue" where Ethan is staying. This doesn't help much because that's a major street that runs through the whole length of downtown Seattle. You'd think a girl from NYC would know this! I could see if this were Mary Anne or Claudia or Kirsty, someone from small town USA not realizing this blunder, but Stacey? The City Girl? Really? Kristy asks if Ethan mentioned a cross street (which yeah, duh, why didn't he?) and Stacey comes to his defense, saying he's not from there. Yeah, but he should still know the address if he's planning on meeting Stacey and it wouldn't be that hard to figure out.
They do manage to find the Corner Coffee Shop and Stacey goes in and waits...and waits. Half an hour later, Ethan still isn't there and she begins to panic. She calls Ethan (with a pay phone, snicker!) and leaves the following message:
"This is Ethan...I mean, Stacey! At the Corner. I'm Stacey, and can Ethan call me? No, he can't, what am I saying? McGill-Stacey McGill. Um...I'll call later."
Smooth, McGill. She then calls the operator and gets the address of other coffee shops with similar sounding names and writes them all down. It's too bad smart phones didn't exist during this trip because then she could just text Ethan or look up the address. They have to check three other addresses. One of them is by the aquarium, one of them is by the Amtrak Station, and one of them is by the Space Needle.
Now, remember, they're in downtown Seattle with a fucking RV. That is just insane. I love how Stacey says they "zipped through downtown Seattle." Yeah, no, that doesn't happen. When we went to Seattle, we parked in a parking garage, then did a lot of walking and we took the monorail from the Space Needle to downtown Seattle. You don't want to be driving a car, much less an RV in downtown Seattle. I feel like Peter Lerangis maybe hasn't ever been to Seattle? IDK?
Then dumbass Stacey realizes she left her pack at the original coffee shop they were at and has to go back to retrieve it. She's super lucky that nobody took it and the cashier had it and held onto it for her. And guess who is there? Why it's Ethan! Apparently, he pushed back the time and had called her parents to have them call her and tell her (again, this would be so much easeier if they had Smart Phones! Drat you, late '90s!), but her parents never got the message because they were both on vacation. (Since when does Ed McGill go on vacations?) So I guess she had the right coffee shop all along.
While Stacey is having her coffee date, the others go see a Mariners game. Ugh, I would be so ticked off if I were Mary Anne, Dawn, or Claudia. Even Jack and Jeff, who seem to like baseball, have to be tired of going to all these games. And you're in freaking Seattle! Why not go to the Space Needle or Pike Place Market. They are a few years before the EMP (Experience Music Project) which was one of my favorite attractions when I visited Seattle the second time. (It's now called the Museum of Pop Culture and I'm not sure if it's still the same when it was the EMP, but it still has the funky exterior). Also, too bad the Chihuly Garden and Glass exhibit (which is right next to the Space Needle) didn't open until 2012 because Claudia would have LOVED that. But you'd think she'd want to go to some art museum/exhibit. Hopefully they did get to go to other sites besides the Kingdome and we just didn't hear about it because this chapter is told from Stacey's POV and she spends most of her time with a boy. A boy who lives in NYC, much closer to her, and she could have visited anytime.
They end their evening by going up the Space Needle where they share a kiss. Stacey had such a wonderful time with Ethan that she can't help gushing about it to Claudia who she's supposed to be mad at. (And unless Stacey had something super juicy in that journal, I don't understand why she was so mad at Claudia. From what we read, it just seems like a mundane journal of what they've been doing on their trip. Who cares if Claudia accidentally saw a page? This is why I think there was something in that journal that she didn't want other people to see, but if she did, we never heard about what it was!) Obviously, Stacey just wants to rub it in Claud's face that she just had a romantic evening. Well, that's how it came off to me because she seems to conveniently forget about their fight. They do make up and everything is fine between them from that point on.
So that's it for the Northern Route RV. Before I go on to discuss the Southern Route, I have to wonder about something. Where did they sleep? In the RV? Did Jack just pull over or did they find a camping ground? They don't really discuss their sleeping arrangements. We know they spend the night at Yellowstone and Jack gets a couple of hotel rooms for everyone in San Fransisco. I kind of feel like Jack had a rotten deal because Watson and Elizabeth could at least take turns driving their RV, giving the other a rest, but Jack is the only one old enough to drive.
So to remind everyone, the Southern Route RV has Abby, Mallory, Jessi, and these members of the Brewer/Thomas gang: Elizabeth, Watson, David Michael, Karen, and Andrew.
Abby is in heaven when they go to Graceland because she's an Elvis Stan. I don't remember any of the other books ever mentioning this, but I'm sure it's in there....right? I mean, I like a couple of Elvis songs, but I wouldn't be that enthralled to visit Graceland. I also think he's dead and has always been dead since he died in 1977. They do talk about how he might still be alive and of course Karen thinks she sees him, but she just saw a lookalike which doesn't surprise me they see a few of at Graceland. If people dress up like their favorite super heroes at ComicCon, then it would make sense that they dress up like Elvis when they visit Graceland!
Watson and Elizabeth drop off the kids at Graceland. I don't know if I would be comfortable having the oldest person in the group be 13 and have her take care of my three kids in a city I've never been to at a pretty popular tour destination. Also, I don't buy this at all:
Watson announced that he and Mrs. Brewer needed "time off". He agreed to drop us kids at Graceland while they went to take a tour of a World War II bomber.
I mean, I already stated that Graceland wouldn't be my desired attraction, but even I would rather tour that than that a WWII bomber. Also, if they need "time off", why not go back to the RV (or hotel?) and take a nap. That's what I would do. Also, why is Watson called by his first name, but Elizabeth is always called "Mrs. Brewer"? That seems weird to me. I NEVER called my friends' parents "Mr. and Mrs. Whoever, I always referred to them by their first names. The only people I referred to as a "Mr./Mrs./Ms. were my teachers. They're just so formal this way, but yet Watson has always been called Watson. Even Jack is called Mr. Schafer throughout the entire book. Even Mary Anne calls him Mr. Schafer. He's your stepsister's, dad, for god's sake; stop being so formal! Okay, tangent over!
Elizabeth's pick was the Grand Canyon and Abby is super nervous about going there. We find out it's because it was her father's favorite place to visit. They had planned a trip for the whole family to go right before he was killed in a car accident, so they never made it out there and Abby doesn't want to go because she knows it will be too painful. This just broke my heart:
Anna and I were nine. We were so excited. Dad had made all the plans. I remember every detail. We were going to stay at the Mather Campground and take a mule ride into the South Rim. I wanted so badly to try hiking to the bottom, the way Dad had always done, but he said no.
"When you're old enough, Abby, we will," he told me. "If you girls love the canyon as much as I do, I promise we'll go there many, many times together."
We didn't even make it one time.
That is soooo sad. And good call for Mr. Stevenson for saying NO to a nine-year-old wanting to hike all the way to the bottom! I've never been to the Grand Canyon, but that has to be a strenuous hike. Nobody knows about all this, so they don't know how personal this is for Abby. Of course she does see the Grand Canyon and she ends up loving it and feels closer to her dad and wants to go there again with Anna and her mom. It's all actually very sweet.
Apparently, Jessi also gets to go to more than one place. The first place the Southbound RV visits is her hometown, Oakley, NJ. Her grandparents are making dinner for everyone and all her aunts, uncles, and cousins are coming over as well. The dinner consists of fried chicken, buttered biscuits, and okra. The chicken and biscuits, I can take or leave, but the okra? Get that slimy stuff away from me!
This chapter is only in the book so Jessi can think Mallory is racist. Yep, you read that right. Jessi thinks her best friend (the one who stood up for her when all those kids who really were being racist when Jessi first started SMS) is a fucking racist. Seriously, Jessi, WTF? I've said it before and I'll say it again: Mal really does get shitted on in these Super Specials, doesn't she? I mean, even this is a new low for her. However, she never knows that Jessi thought she was a racist. Why does Jessi think she's a racist? Apparently, the way Mal is acting reminds Jessi of this girl, Alison (who I'm pretty sure we've never heard of until this moment and this backstory is only here to exist for Jessi to compare Mal to somebody), who Jessi invited over when she first moved to Stoneybook. Alison laughs at her family's African statues, did not want to eat the food that Jessi had touched (I'm unclear if Jessi had touched the actual food or just touched the plate it was on, because if she had touched the food, I also would not to eat food that somebody had physically touched!), and her dad isn't very nice when he comes to pick up his daughter and asks the Ramseys if more of "you people" are moving to town. That definitely reeks of racism. However, I'm confused...if Alison is a racist, why did she accept Jessi's offer to come over? That makes no sense. So long story short, the whole reason for that random backstory is so Jessi can have this thought:
Why did that pop into my mind? The look in Mallory's eyes. The unease. It reminded me of Alison.
Never, I said to myself.
Mallory could never be like that. She was a totally different kind of person. So were her parents. It was an insult to put Mallory and Alison in the sane thought.
But still....
Like, seriously, WTF, Jessi? She thinks the African art her grandparents house is decorated with is making Mallory uncomfortable (and, if for some reason, it is, we NEVER hear from Mallory about it) and "Was there a side of her I didn't know?" I had to laugh when Jessi thinks that maybe Mallory doesn't like the smells coming from the kitchen, then comments, "Couldn't be. Everybody loves fried chicken." Um, have you ever even MET Dawn? Also, no, Jessi, not everybody loves fried chicken. I like it; I don't LOVE it.
When Jessi goes into the kitchen to help her grandmother with the food, her grandmother comments that Mal seems a little uptight. When Jessi tells her she's going to Dalton, her grandmother doesn't seem very thrilled about that and is asking why a ten-year-old would want to go there and Jessi reminds her she's eleven, like that magically makes her an adult, although in Stoneybrook, remember, you magically turn into an adult once you turn 13, so she's not far off. Her grandmother tells her to be prepared.
"What happened between the races was like an infection, Jessica. A virus. Back when our family was in Dalton, that virus was full-blown. What you see in those photos might not be too pretty. Some people think the civil rights movement cured the sickness. But it didn't. Oh, sure, it made things better. But it was more like a vaccine. The infection is still inside people. Even the ones who think they're immune. You and me."
And Jessi thinks, And Mallory. So pretty much the only reason we have this whole Jessi-thinks-Mallory-might-be-a-racist chapter is because of her choice to visit where her ancestors were slaves and so we can get this dialogue from her grandmother and so Jessi can *think* that her best friend *might* be a racist. This wouldn't have happened if she had just gone to New Orleans or Texas or a dance school in Atlanta! Jessi's grandma notices Mal seems to be her old self, chatting with Keisha, Jessi's cousin (and original best friend):
I looked back toward the living room. Mallory was in full view now. She was laughing. Keisha was on one side of her, Isaac on the other. Little Kara, who's only two, was hugging Mal's legs. Grandma saw it, too. She chuckled. "Looks like she finally got over the jitters, didn't she?"
"Well, some people are just afraid of the unknown, I guess," I said.
"Beg pardon?" Grandma gave me a puzzled look.
"Well, you know, she's not used to the...decor and the neighborhood--"
"She's your best friend, darling. The poor thing was worried about making a good impression, that's all."
Mallory saw me now and gave a cheerful wave. I waved back. Wow. Grandma's words hit me like a hammer. She was right about Mallory, I just knew it. I felt awful. Totally ashamed. Why hadn't I realized what was going on? Why had I assumed the worst?
Can I have Mary Anne's AND Jessi's grandmothers be my grandmothers?
Jessi, you assumed the worst because the ghostwriters (especially there ones who write the SSs) abhor Mallory and wanted you to think she was a racist. We never hear about this from Mallory's POV and she never knows that her own best friend even thinks she might be a racist. Because if she does, no way those girls are staying friends, right? Actually, in the real world, I don't think Mal and Jessi remain close friends. Mal goes off to boarding school and doesn't Jessi go to that dance school in NYC? I see them keeping in touch through Facebook, but that's all.
I can empathize with Mallory feeling shy/nervous. All of Jessi's Oakley relatives are there and I think Mal has only met her grandparents and Keisha. I am one who absolutely hates large gatherings (and unlike Mal, I could give a damn about giving a good impression) and even with my own relatives, I feel inadequate to everyone, I can't even imagine meeting a bunch of people I don't even know. When I find myself in large groups, I feel sooo uncomfortable that I usually end up in the bathroom, crying. Oops, did I just admit that?
When she goes to Dalton, it's only her, Mal, and Abby. Watson and Elizabeth take the younger kids to lunch since the brochure said "some images may not be suitable for young viewers." Hmm, I guess 11 (or even 13 for that matters) doesn't qualifiy as a "young viewer." Wait, this is Stoneybrook where one turns into an adult once they turn 13! What am I talking about? Jessi is in small tour group and asks if there are records of the slave families and the guide tells her that it's impossible to know who they were since they were only referred by their first names.
She meets a woman who tells her she's there to work on "some doctoral research on the Mississippi slave trade" and tells Jessi "it's almost impossible to find specific genealogical information on slave families." Jessi will later write this woman when she gets back to Stoneybrook, telling her she thinks they might be related. So I guess at least she found out something about her family. But, gee, that's awfully convenient she's related to the woman she met at Dalton!
Jessi actually even narrates the chapter where they go to Ten Gallon, Texas, and make no mention of how she's always wanted to go to Texas (also Ten Gallon does not appear to be a real place in Texas). They go to a rodeo because that was David Michael's totally random choice for something to see. However, they feel sorry for the calf and decide not to watch it. Man, it was a good thing Dawn wasn't there! She would have had a fit!
Like I mentioned earlier, we never get any of Mallory's thoughts of visiting Jessi's family, so for all we know, she could be a raging racist! They go to Chincoteague (which I believe is in Virginia) and I think even Jessi is more excited about this than her chosen destination. Though, like Mal, she does love the Misty of Chincoteague books. I've never read the books so I know nothing about it. I guess Misty is based on a real horse and you can see the original Misty, preserved, which seems kind of morbid. Luckily, they don't see that!
I had to laugh because Mal is dismayed by the traffic and how touristy everything is:
This wasn't at all what I was expecting. This wasn't the Chinoteague Island I'd read about. Chinoteague was a little village where kids ran around barefoot in the streets and old folks swapped stories on the front porch. At least it was in all the Marguerite Henry books.
Yeah, and the book was published in 1947 and who knows when it took place. She would have to know it wouldn't be like the book, right? They have a picnic on Assateague Island (WHO came up with that name?) where all the ponies are. At first they don't see any, but then, of course Mal spots a whole herd of them and her whole vacation is complete and she's happy. Just nobody tell her that her best friend thought she was a racist!
While the gang was in Chincoteague, they meet a girl named Felicitas (is that just a fancier version of Felicity?) who goes by the name Liz. Mal comments that she's about her age, and to me, she feels more authentic at eleven than Jessi or Mal do who both come off way older than 11 (not all the time, though!) Liz is traveling with her grandparents and she's a know-it-all, annoying kid. They are taking a trip to the West Coast and they will run into the Brewer/Thomas RV a few more times. Honestly, I'm not sure what the point of this whole storyline was.
At the beginning of the book, I noticed the dedication page said "Special thank to Bonnie Bryant, Clifton Lewis, Peter Rogers, and Janet Vultee." Now I know Bonnie Bryant wrote the Saddle Club series and I wondered if she helped with the Chincoteague chapter. You know, even though her series was set in Virginia, I don't remember the Pine Hollow girls ever going to Chinoteague...you'd think they would since they love horses! Though it's possible they did and I either just don't remember or it was in a SC book I didn't read. I don't know who the other people are, though.
When they visit Waston's old college buddy in Oklahoma, there's a tornado (I see you, Lerangis, I know you saw Twister the year before) and everyone has to take shelter in the bathroom because there's no basement. We find out that Watson went to Baylor which kind of surprised me because I thought he would be more of an East Coast school kind of guy. So is he from Texas, I wonder. I doubt it because we would get a description of his "Texas twang" in every book. Did Lerangis go to Baylor and this is a shoutout? Watson's friend and his wife have a baby and of course the girls are all gaga over her and want to hold her. I mean, it's just a baby, chill. The tornado is a little scary, but nothing too destructive.
The Southern RV also makes an impromptu stop in Zuni, New Mexico. That is the place where the SES kids had penpals from and there was a fire at their school and Dawn and the others hold a fund raising event for them in Dawn and the Big Sleepover. I always just assumed Zuni was a fictional town like Stoneybrook, but it's actually a real place in New Mexico. While there, they see a plaque at the new school that is dedicated to "The Children of Stoneybrook, Connecticut". Karen is all about semantics and says it was "not all the children; just one particular school." (I mean, technically she is right. Why not give SES credit?) It's pretty obvious Lerangis read Dawn and the Big Sleepover before writing this chapter because they meet some of the kids and Mal mentions she met the kids who were penpals with some of her siblings and they also meet Haley Braddock's penpal.
I guess Hell must have frozen over because I actually feel sorry for Karen Brewer in this book! I mean, it's only for a fleeting moment, but still! Because they have gone to Zuni, Watson doesn't think they'll have time to go to Four Corners, Karen's choice of destination. They still have to go the Grand Canyon and the San Diego Zoo before they go to Palo City. Karen had her heart set going to Four Corners because she planned to put her left foot in Arizona, her right foot in New Mexico, then lean down and put her left hand in Utah and her right hand in Colorado. That made me laugh because it sounds like something young me would do. But, of course, Karen turns on the waterworks and her parents feel bad for her and they end up going to Four Corners. Figures. Well, if they had skipped it, I still would have felt bad for Karen. Here we have Kristy in the other RV getting to go to, like, ten destinations, and Karen wouldn't have gotten to go to the one place she wanted to.
Apparently, David Michael had told Karen that Four Corners was just going to be a patch of dirt and I was like, WTF? Isn't there a monument there? I've never been there, but I've seen the episode of Breaking Bad where Skyer goes there. Of course, there is a monument when Karen and the others go there.
Their last stop is the San Diego zoo and Andrew is thrilled to see the panda bears.
Oh! We also get a huge continuity error when both RVs reach the Schafer house in Palo City and the We Love Kids Club girls are there as well and Maggie says this to Dawn:
"Stephie Robertson's mom wants you to baby-sit next Wednesday."
Um, I thought Stephie's mom died when she was a baby? Whoops-a-daisies!
I really liked this Super Special (even though some things drove me crazy) and was thinking about which RV I would want to ride in. Even though the Southern RV has Karen in it, I feel like it would be fun to visit the Grand Canyon, Four Corners, the San Diego Zoo, and Chinoteague. I've been to Chicago, Minneapolis, and Seattle, so it would make more sense for me to go the Southern route.
