Thursday, August 5, 2021

Say Aloha to Your Friends!

 Aloha! It's time to visit Hawaii with the Baby-Sitters Club in Super Special #13, Aloha, Baby-Sitters! The girls are off to the state of beaches, volcanoes, and pineapples because SMS is offering a school trip there. Does this seem odd to anyone else? Not that Hawaii doesn't have its share of historical and cultural relevance, but I don't think of it as a place you would go on a class trip...no, Hawaii is reserved for those on romantic getaways or honeymoons. Or people who like to surf! When I was in high school (I don't think my middle school ever offered trips), they offered trips to France, Germany, and Spain (since French, German, and Spanish were the languages taught) during the summer (and I went to France with a group from my school since I took French) and I also remember there were trips offered to New York and D.C. Less than ten students went on those trips and I'm not sure if there was a limit or they just didn't get that many kids to sign up for them for whatever reason. When I went to France, there was probably twenty of us (and two teacher chaperones) and we were paired with another high school group from Seattle. When SMS goes to Hawaii, there are 50 students and six teacher chaperones. There's really no reason why SMS is offering freakin' middle schoolers a trip to Hawaii. Honestly, if I were a parent, there's no way I would let my child go to Hawaii as a middle schooler. I have to wonder how this Super Special came about. It is ghost written by Peter Lerangis and I wonder if he went to Hawaii and volunteered to write this SS or if he got to go to Hawaii because of this SS (now that would be a sweet deal) or if he's never been to Hawaii and just did a lot of research? I think this is the first SS where we lead into it with a book from the regular series. In book #98, Dawn and Too Many Sitters (which I read last summer) we first learn about the trip to Hawaii being offered to SMS students. I went back to that book (well, e-book) to refresh my memory. Apparently SMS made a deal with a group called World Tours, Inc. where kids can get a discount on one of their tours as long as 50 of them sign up (and teacher chaperones don't count) and they have to be between 11-14. Gee, how convenient. Also, who lets a child as young as that go on a school trip so far away. Or am I just overreacting? The trip is only $500. I realize that at 13, that's a lot of money, but that sounds really cheap...even in 1996 money. The girls have to raise half, then their parents will pay the other half.

So everyone is going except for Kristy and Mallory. Kristy isn't going because her family is going to Hawaii later that summer and Mallory isn't going because everyone hates Mallory and why she should have any fun? I mean, that might as well be the answer. They say it's because of money and she already told Mrs. Stone she would help run a play group at her farm. GIRL, you have a chance to go to freakin' HAWAII. I'm sure this Mrs. Stone character can find someone else to help run some play group. Good freakin' gravy! However, the book does say Mal said she thought about finding someone to take her place and Mrs. Stone said that would be okay, but it's mostly a money issue that the Pikes can't afford a measly $250 to let their daughter enjoy a trip to Hawaii. I bet Mallory really resents her parents! Of course the real reason is that the ghost writers don't want to deal with a story for her in Hawaii. Poor Mallory; once again gets the shaft in a Super Special! (And wait until we get to her section!)

I should mention that I first read this book four years ago (along with SS 14 and 15) when I got them all online. By the time this book came out, I wasn't reading the BSC anymore, but decided to check out the ones I never read recently. 

Let's take a look at the cover:


The boys on each end are Logan and Robert and I believe Robert is the one on the right side with the red shirt and yellow and black Hawaiian shirt. You would think the blonde next to Robert would be Stacey, but there's something about the way her hair is styled she looks more like Dawn. But the other blonde in the pink doesn't look like Stacey OR Dawn, so I'm just really confused. For a dancer, Jessi sure looks stiff. Mary Anne also seems like she doesn't want to be dancing and her denim pants look tight. Abby's dress is hella clashy, but she sees to be having the most fun with her "wave your arms in the air like you just don't care" attitude. Claudia's floral crown is cute and is something she would do. Why the hell are they all (except for Robert) wearing sneakers and socks on the beach?? The background is nice. 

Okay, let's talk about each girl's adventures in Hawaii (or in Stoneybrook):

Jessi is a little on the obnoxious side in this. Her whole thing is since Mal can't go to Hawaii, she's going to bring Hawaii back to Mal! Her plan is to have everyone write in a diary about their trip that they will present to Mal, take a buttload of pics, and she even has a tape recorder (which she records the ocean at one point! And another time, she records the freaking wind). I'm sorry, but if I were Mal, I would be a little ticked off. (Mal ends up loving the whole thing, so good for her). If I couldn't go on this amazing trip to Hawaii that all my friends were going on, I wouldn't want to hear every minute detail of their trip or see their 13 rolls of films (Jessi, at one point, tells us she used that many!) and why the hell would I want to hear a recording of the ocean? What is the point of that?? Tell me about your trip, sure, show me the best pics you took, send me some postcards, buy me some cute seashell earrings, a Hawaiian shirt, some macadamia nuts, but I don't need a play-by-play of all ten days of your vacation! Jessi even writes this to Mal:

After you read this, see my photos, and hear my tape, you'll think you were here!

Yeah, no, she won't. 

 Everywhere Jessi goes, she's furiously busy scribbling in her journal because she doesn't want to miss a thing. It's like, GIRL, you are in HAWAII. She even writes a paragraph about the banana split dessert Claudia has. WHY?!?! Put down the damn notebook and pen and ENJOY yourself! Oh, remember how I told you she took 13 rolls of film? Well, each roll had 36 exposures that so means she took nearly 500 pictures!! Now, when I was in Maine recently, I took that many pics, but that was with my phone, so I could delete photos and post the ones I wanted to on social media and I wasn't....what do you call it when you take a roll of film to the store? Getting it developed, right? OMG, remember those cameras? I took one of those to France with me. They're so big and bulky. God, we are so spoiled with our digital cameras in our phones now! Of course, there were those disposable ones you could use...I remember using those, too. God, can you imagine being Mallory and having to look through 500 freakin' photos your friend took on her vacation? Shoot me now. 

Jessi mentions they go to Chinatown for lunch "where I had something called Szechuan chicken." It surprises me she's never heard of that. God, that sounds so good right now. I think I'm just hungry. 

If this had been my first introduction to Abby, I may have found her super obnoxious. Before I first read this book, I did get a haul of BSC books and there was an Abby book in there, so this was not my first introduction to Abby. I honestly don't remember my first impression of Abby, but I like her for the most part. Her "allergy talk" is super annoying, but I realize that's not her fault. I do find Abby a little grating in this. She's about to start her ten day trip to Hawaii and she wakes up super early the day they're suppose to leave and we find out GIRLFRIEND HASN'T EVEN PACKED YET! WTF? How are you not even packed for a ten day trip to Hawaii on the morning you're supposed to leave? When I went to Maine for eight days, I made a freakin' spreadsheet of everything I would need and checked them off as I packed them! (The day before I left, not the day of!) Such a Dawn thing to do! 

She just pretty much dumps all her clothes and toiletries in a suitcase...this is absolutely ridiculous. Honestly, this chapter made me so infuriated with Abby. Packing is an art...you should not just dump all your clothes into your suitcase. 

In case you're wondering, Anna does not go on the trip. I'm sure it's explained why she doesn't go in Dawn and Too Many Sitters, but I think she made the right decision. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure Hawaii is a wonderful place to visit and I can see why it attracts so many tourists, but good God, when they describe how long it takes to get there...well, honestly, it doesn't even seem worth it! All the students meet at the SMS parking lot early in the morning and take a two hour bus ride to the airport in New York. Then it takes five hours to fly to L.A. where they have about an hour layover. Then it takes ANOTHER five hours to fly to Hawaii! This shocked me cuz I figured it only took a couple hours, maybe three at the most to fly to Hawaii from LAX. I don't know why I thought that; I guess I thought Hawaii was closer to the mainland than it actually is. Apparently it takes five hours to fly there! 

One of the most shocking, insane scenes happens pretty early on when they're at JFK, eating breakfast, waiting for their flight. Their flight is called and they still haven't been through security! Uh....WTF? I realize this book was published before 9/11, but still....were people this lax about airline travel that they didn't even go through security until AFTER their flight is called? That just seems insane to me! And this is 50 kids and six teachers who have to go through security with God knows who else is going through at the time since they're at a crowded international airport in one of the biggest cities! Good Lord! This make me so anxious, you have no idea. 

Abby's main storyline is being in a commercial for suntan lotion. She and a group of nine other students (including Stacey) and a teacher are at Waikiki Beach. And honestly, from this description, it doesn't sound very appealing to me:

Finding a spot for ten kids and a grownup on Waikiki Beach is a little like finding a seat on the NYC subway at rush hour.

Ugh, no thank you.

So they're at the beach and a volleyball lands at her feet. She tosses it back and notices a camera crew is set up around the volleyball net. She quickly realizes they're filming something and her ears perk up when she hears the director say they have a delay because one of the actors can't do the job and that they won't be able to shoot that day. Abby blurts out that she can play and when the woman asks how old she is, she replies 18. Now, the way Abby is drawn in one of the illustrations, she actually does look 18, but let's be honest...NO 13-year-old looks like she's 18. Uh-uh, not happening. Instead of asking for ID, they just believe her and let her into the commercial. Uh...okay. Don't think it works that way! One of the teacher even supports this and tells Abby if anyone asks, she'll say she's her agent. 

Abby starts to get a really big head and thinks this is her first step into stardom. She thinks Steven Spielberg is going to be watching the commercial and will "discover" her and make her into a big star. I don't know what's more unbelievable: that scenario or that she thinks Kristy will be her agent. Yes, Abby, because a 13-year-old girl can be your agent! That makes perfect sense!

So Abby does the commercial and ends up getting a wicked, nasty sunburn. Why, you ask? Because she's a moron. Seriously. She is about to put suntan lotion on, but realize it's Coppertone and she told the director that she uses the product called Day-Nite Suntan Lotion which they're shooting the commercial for. Because of this, she doesn't want to be seen using the competition and doesn't put any on AT ALL! She's not worried about it because it's 7:30 and the sun won't get bad until 10. Well, the sun is still the sun and in those three hours she gets burned. She does slather herself with Day-Nite sunscreen during their break (which she says smells awful), but the sun has already done it's damage. I just can't imagine going to a beach in Hawaii and not slathering yourself with sunscreen. That just seems really stupid not to do that. 

Mary Anne doesn't spend any time with Logan (at least not until the very last day) because her friend have been complaining she's been spending too much time with him. Well, he's her boyfriend, you nitwits! Heh, I wonder if Richard paid her friends to say that to her because he was worried that some hanky panky might happen if they weren't separated. (Not that I think Mary Anne would ever go further than kissing). 

I was pleasantly surprised that their hotel in Honolulu is described as "a squat, rectangular, four-story, glass-and-steel building in the middle of town." That actually seems realistic for a large group of teens. I would have thought they would have been in a hotel right on the ocean with their own private beach, so I appreciate that this was realistic. 

 Later, they will go to another part of Oahu and from their hotel they are able to see where Gilligan's Island was filmed. Heh, if this book was written today, it would probably be Lost. Dawn tells them she once saw Bob Denver (except she refers to him as Gilligan) at a dinner theater show in L.A. She tells them, "He's not young, anymore." Well, no shit, Dawn, it's called aging. But to be fair, since she and her friends and family never age, she probably has no concept of it. Poor thing. 

While there, a family with two young girls checks into the hotel which Mary Anne describes as "huge" and they are missing their five year old son who they are frantically searching for. Instead of going on whatever group activity the students have planned that day, she asks if she can stay behind and help with the search. This kid is missing for an hour and a half and the police are called and all the hotel staff is searching while Mary Anne volunteers to watch the two girls. Needless to say, the parents are a frantic mess. This has to be every parents' worse nightmare. All the familiar places are checked: the pools, the game room, the park across the street, their room.

Of course it is Mary Anne who saves the day and finds the young boy. When his sisters tell her their room number (243), she just figures the boy got the numbers mixed up and checks all variations of the room number. Of course all the rooms are locked, but when she knocks on one, she hears Joseph answer her and he opens the door with help from Mary Anne. Apparently, he had forgotten his shell and went back to their room without telling anyone, but he went to the wrong room. Don't ask my how he could get into a room that wasn't even his (and I doubt he even had a key to get into his room and even if he did, the key wouldn't work on a different room, so WTF?) He said he realized he was in the wrong room, but wasn't able to open the door (too heavy or something), so he cried, then fell asleep on the bed. And that's when Mary Anne found him. Still unsure of how this kid could get into a room that wasn't his and even more surprised that the hotel staff/police didn't think to check ALL the rooms (you know, just to make sure nothing nefarious is going on, not that I would ever think this since this is a BSC book, after all!) 

So all is well and Mary Anne is the hero. This prompts Mr. and Mrs. Reynolds, who are the managers of the hotel, to ask Mary Anne if she would like to baby-sit their three kids tomorrow since their grandfather, who usually watches them, is out of town. Mary Anne is thrilled about the prospect of "spending a day with a typical Hawaiian family" and "learning about another culture firsthand" so she agrees. Oh, and how did Mrs. Reynolds know Mary Anne was a baby-sitter? It wasn't because she volunteered to watch the young girls when people were searching for their brother, it was because, and I am not kidding you, she was wearing a white t-shirt that said The Baby-Sitters Club and underneath that, it said Call KL5-3231. Kristy had them made for all of them and while she doesn't specifically tell the they have to wear them in Hawaii, for some reason some of them do (like Mary Anne here). Um, why? Why would you were a t-shirt in Hawaii advertising your business in Connecticut? So stupid. 

So Mary Anne gets permission to baby-sit for the Reynolds because we can't have a Super Special without baby-sitting, even though we get baby-sitting chapters with Mal and Kristy who are back in Stoneybrook. I feel like it's Mary Anne who always get stuck with baby-sitting when they're on vacation (maybe "stuck" isn't the right word since she wants to do it). She baby-sat those two British kids with Stacey in New York, Stephie in California, and now these kids. 

I wanted to smack Mary Anne in her baby-sitting chapter. She mentions how "familiar" everything looks. The kids appear like normal American kids and the house looks like a normal house. She tells us:

I don't know what I was expecting. Ukulele music floating through a thatched hut? Kids wearing grass skirts and leis? A luau for breakfast? Okay, maybe not. But something a little different.

 At least she admits she probably wasn't going to see all of that, but good Lord! She is also wondering why the Reynolds have a very un-Hawaiian name. Well, it's because Mr. Reynold's father (the kids' grandfather who usually watches them) is white and married a Hawaiian woman after the war. He lives with them, but is out of town, so that's why they need a baby-sitter. 

Claudia has a sad storyline and a bit of a heavy one. She has signed up to take a group tour of Pearl Harbor. It's only her, Mary Anne, and four other students with one of the teachers. I was kinda surprised this wasn't a mandatory thing since it is an important part of our history. I guess the other students had better things to do like go to the beach! I'm also kind of surprised Claudia's parents didn't sit her down and talk to her about it because they had to know there was a good chance she would be going to Pearl Harbor if she was going to Hawaii (especially the same island!) Claudia is well aware of the significance of Pearl Harbor (I was super shocked when she told us she read a book about it, but maybe it was required reading for school? From the way she said it, I didn't think so. That seemed out of character for Claud to read a book about a heavy topic that wasn't school related)! After visiting the site and watching footage of the bombing, she begins to feel sick to her stomach and feels tremendous guilt. She also begins to wonder if people will know she's of Japanese descent and begins to wish she she had blonde hair and blue eyes which is really sad (and kinda icky that she had to feel that way). I just felt so bad for her. 

She knows her grandparents were living in Japan when this happened and wonders how they reacted to it and if they in favor of it since the Emperor had ordered the attack and how Mimi used to tell her the Emperor was revered by everyone in Japan. She is horrified by the thought that Mimi could approve of this. We will learn later (after Claudia has talked to her parents about this when she gets back) that her mom tells her that Mimi never talked about WWII and refused to talk about it. Feels like a cop out, if you ask me. Oh, well, they probably didn't want to open a can of worms with that. 

Mary Anne is asked to baby sit the Reynolds kids agin, but she doesn't really want to because she wants to enjoy her vacation (I am SHOCKED!), but she gets the idea to get Claudia, who has confided in Mary Anne about what she's been going through, to baby sit for them. She does and gets really nervous when the grandfather comes home (she finds out he was in the war) and checks to make sure there aren't any weapons in the house so he doesn't shoot her. That just got really dark. Of course, the man is really nice to her and they have a nice little chat and Claudia says she feels better, but does she really? He basically tells her she can't be held responsible for her ancestor's actions and that she "can't take on the burden of an entire country". She's reminded of the Japanese-American detention camps and thinks of the burden that was put on them. Then he adds that "the atom bombs made Pearl Harbor look small by comparison." Honestly, I'm surprised Claud didn't leave that house feeling more miserable and confused than ever!

To lighten this up a little bit, there's one point where Claudia spells "wrong" as "rong" and it just looks so....rong. Heh, sorry. She also can't seem to pronounce "Oahu", which I get if you aren't familiar with it, but she pronounces it as "Ohio" at one point and how do you even get that from "Oahu"? 

Can Stacey ever have a Super Special adventure where she doesn't almost die? Seriously, in California Girls, she gets in a car crash; in Snowbound, she and her mom get stranded in the blizzard and nobody has any idea where she is; and in this book, its sort of a hybrid of those two: she gets in a helicopter crash and nobody knows where she (or the three other students and the pilot) is. But she's fine (and so are the others) and everyone is found.

Stacey's been snapping at Robert this whole trip because he was flirting with the flight attendant. He's also been flirting with pretty and popular Sue Archer. (Who has the name "Sue" in the '90s? Nobody. It's a very '50s name). I think this book is right before when she and Robert break up. 

I find it absolutely ridiculous that Dawn is on this trip. First of all, she doesn't even attend SMS anymore! I thought this trip was for SMS students? Yes, it's true she had to be put on the waiting list and could only go if the roster wasn't filled up. I get why she wants to go with her friends, but wouldn't it make more sense to go with her family in California? I'm sure her dad would take her. The plane ride sure would be a helluva lot shorter too (Only five hours instead of 12!) 

When the plane makes it's layover at LAX (where they're only there for an hour), Dawn is greeted by her dad, Jeff, and Carol. Now, I could understand them doing this if she still lived in Stoneybrook, but why the hell are they driving all the way out to LAX (no way they live near the airport!) for an hour to see someone who now lives permanently with them? Abby, who narrates that chapter, comments that Dawn was so surprised to see them. Yeah, I bet she was. She probably thought why the hell are they driving all this way to see her for just a few minutes when she now LIVES with them, permanently.

Dawn doesn't really have a storyline. Well, she cleans up a trashed beach with the help of Jessi and some local kids. It's a very Dawn thing. But again, there is no need for Dawn to be in this book. Sorry, Dawn. Sorry Dawn fans.

So that's all the adventures in Hawaii. Back in Stoneybrook, Kristy and Mallory still have BSC meetings at Claud's room. I think that's a little weird. Why can't they just leave a voice mail on Claud's voicemail and tell their clients to call the Brewers' or the Pikes' residence? Mr. and Mrs. Kishi must be saints to put up with that. Kristy doesn't really have anything to do in this book. She baby-sits for Karen and Karen's friend Tia, who is from Nebraska and is obsessed with NYC. As a Nebraskan, I was a little insulted by the fact that the girl from Nebraska is from a farm...of course she is. I also love that she comes from a farm to go to...Farm Camp. That must have been so exciting for her. (Can you feel the sarcasm dripping from my voice?)

One of the reasons Mallory can't go to Hawaii is because she has to help Mrs. Stone with Farm Camp, but yet we never see her doing that. Well, maybe we see a bit of it. Her main storyline involves her and a thirty-something woman. It starts when Mal is baby-sitting Jenny and Andrea Prezzioso and Mrs. P. tells Mal that if Jenny throws one of her tantrums, she's just supposed to ignore her until it passes. 

So of course Jenny throws a tantrum (before and after her mother leaves!) and Mal follows Mrs. P's advice. However, the trouble starts when Jenny asks to go to the park to play. Oh, boy, not very smart of Mal. I would not be taking this girl to a public place! While Jenny is playing and Mal is keeping an eye on her and sitting with Andrea, an ice cream truck pulls up nearby and Jenny demand to have a Fudgsicle. (Have to say, never been a fan of the the Fudgsicle. Give me an ice cream bar or sandwich.) Mal tells her no and all hell breaks loose. Jenny is screaming and throwing sand and tells Mal that she's stupid and she hates her. (Poor Mallory!) Of course there are other kids there with their mothers and that has to be a super awkward position to be in for both Mal and the other adults. This one particular woman, who was nearby when this happened tells Mal, "She seems to be in great pain." What? How is a kid screaming and demanding ice cream in great pain? I don't get that at all. The child is in no pain or physical harm at all. Mal tries to explain what she's doing what Jenny's mother asked her to do and the woman replies with, "I'm sure her mom doesn't mean for her child to be neglected, dear." Again, what is she talking about? Jenny is clearly not being neglected. Ignored? Sure, but not neglected. If I were Mal, I would tell this woman to mind her own fucking business. Mal really does get the shitshows of the worst plot lines, doesn't she? 

Mal happens to be wearing her BSC t-shirt with the phone number printed on it and at the next meeting she tells Kristy about what happened and like clockwork, the phone rings after she's done telling the story and when Kristy answers it, it's the woman on the other end of the line. (Who didn't see that coming?) Her name is Margaret Wellfleet and she's calling to report Mallory. She tells Kristy, "I suggest that if you intend to advertise your organization on shirts, you better be sure that those shirts are worn by competent child care personnel." That's a sick burn if I ever heard one.Yep, once again, Mal is getting dumped on here. Unfairly, I might add. Luckily, Kristy is on Mal's side here and know she hasn't done anything wrong. (Good thing Mal told her about this before Kristy answered the phone!) 

Mal has been trying to run into Mrs. Wellfleet at the park because she had "some unfinished business". Girl, just let it go. I don't know what she was hoping to do or say to her. The first few days she doesn't see her at the park, but then one day she takes Margo and Claire there and actually sees Mrs. Wellfleet. It turns out she has a young son who is just as big a brat as Jenny and throws huge tantrums. (Guess he wasn't there the first time Mal meets her? Or he was just behaving that day?) Mal even comments that the kid's tantrum "made Jenny's look mild." Mrs. Wellfleet isn't ignoring her son, she's telling him to stop and is getting all flustered. Mal catches the woman's eye and comments that Mrs. Wellfleet looks guilty. Even though Mal comments she does feel bad for her, she can't help but feel a little gloaty, and hey, I don't blame her. This woman was a total bitch to her.

It sounds like Mal gets a job with them, but we never hear about it and we never hear about the Wellfleets again (not that I can remember), so they must not become regular clients.