East-West Marriage Fest

Baby-Sitters Club Super Special #12, Here Come the Bridesmaids! has a misleading title because there is only one BSC member who is a bridesmaid in this story: Stacey. Yes, Mary Anne was supposed to be one too but in the end never was one. And Dawn was the Maid of Honor. Not that I'm trying to be too picky about the title, all I'm saying is that maybe they could have come up with something better. 

So I always thought this book was the last Super Special I read before I deemed myself too old for the BSC, but while doing some research, I discovered this book came out between #80 - Mallory Pike, #1 Fan and #81 - Kristy and Mr. Mom and I stopped reading the BSC around #76 or 77 (before I picked it up again years later!) But I'm pretty sure I've read this before...not everything was familiar, but I just figured that was because it's been over 20 years since I last read it! Or maybe I just knew that a Super Special existed where Dawn's dad gets married the same day Mrs. Barrett is getting married to her boyfriend. Half the BSC are in California while the other half remain in Stoneybrook.

Dawn wants everyone involved in the two weddings to keep a journal. She ends up calling it "A Tale of Two Coasts." Other names included "Christmas Wedding: Sea to Shining Sea" (Mary Anne's suggestion, and ugh); "Holiday Vows" (Shannon's suggestion, and boring); "Bicoastal Bells" (Stacey's idea, and I like the alliteration); ""I Do x 4"" (Claudia's idea, and meh); and "East-West Marriage Fest" (Kristy's idea, and it made me laugh and I named my entry after it). 

Dawn is living in California when her dad gets married to his long-time girlfriend, Carol. This is when she moved there temporarily and returns to Stoneybrook on Christmas Day, about ten days after the wedding. Of course, she will end up moving to California permanetly about eight books later, so what was the fucking point of moving back to Stoneybrook? She had to transfer her school records to her Cali school, then back to SMS, then back to California. Good God, that sounds exhausting and annoying. If I were Sharon, I would be irritated just with dealing with that! 

Dawn wants to invite her BSC friends to the wedding, but because some of them will be involved with Mrs. Barrett's wedding, only Mary Anne, Kristy, and Claudia make it to the SoCal wedding. Okay, I have to be honest: it makes no sense that any of Dawn's Stoneybrook friends are invited to her father's wedding. Let me give you a list of reasons why:

1) They have only met Jack and Carol once: in California Girls! (Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure this is the second book where other members of the BSC go to California).

2) The wedding appears to be small and intimate, so why would Jack want his daughter's friends from all away across the country to attend? I can understand Sunny and the other girls from the We Love Kids Club since I'm sure Jack and Carol have met them several times, but the BSC? Uh-uh.

3. I understand that Mary Anne is Dawn's best friend and stepsister, but her being there is especially weird considering she is the daughter of Jack's ex's new husband. It gets even more weird when Mary Anne is almost *in* the wedding, but I'll discuss that more when we get to Mary Anne. 

Look, I get why some of the members are there because it wouldn't feel like a BSC Super Special if Dawn were the only member at her dad's wedding, but it just doesn't seem realistic to me, that's all. It would be more realistic if they were all at Mrs. Barrett's wedding since she's a big client for them and they know her and have baby-sat for her kids several times.

Dawn is going to be a bridesmaid at the wedding. Really, she is going to be the Maid of Honor since she and Jeff are the only one who will be in the wedding party. Dawn doesn't know this yet while she is shopping for dresses and also buys one for Mary Anne. I was so confused by this scene. She was with Sunny, Jill, and Maggie shopping for the dresses and from what I gathered, she picked out the dresses herself. Is this a thing? Doesn't the bride usually have a say what the Maid of Honor and bridesmaids wear? I guess if you're a progressive bride, you can just tell your bridesmaids to pick out whatever they feel most comfortable in. However, the dress Dawn chooses both looks and sounds absolutely atrocious: 

The bridesmaid's dress was a satiny material with shirred, off-shoulder sleeves, a fitted bodice and a flared mid-calf skirt. The soft fuchsia color was just right for a wedding on the beach. 

We see Dawn (and Mary Anne) wearing it on the cover and a few black and white illustrations of it in the book. God, what a fugly dress! Also, I'm no expert with colors, but fuchsia for the beach? Really, Dawn? Also, the dress is described as "off-shoulder" and when Mary Anne first sees it she describes it as "a satiny, bare-shoulder dress", but all the drawings do NOT show bare shoulders of the wearers of this dress! 

At her wedding, Carol is described by Dawn as wearing "a flowing Indian-print dress that shimmered in the breeze." But the dress she wears in the illustration looks like it came from Laura Ashley (and we also see Dawn in her hideous dress). It just looks like a boring floral dress. Also, Carol is a brunette in the illustration. I could have sworn in California Girls! she's described as a blonde. (Because you know, every caucasian person from California is a blonde *rolls eyes*). 

Jeff is whining about wearing a tie to the wedding and Jack tells him after he kisses the bride, he can take it off and throw it in the air, so it's a cute moment when Jeff does that. 

A lot of Dawn's storyline also involves Mary Anne, so I think would be a good time to go more in depth about the dress/bridesmaid drama. Like I mentioned earlier, Dawn also buys Mary Anne the same dress because she wants both of them to be bridesmaids. This will come back to bite Dawn in the ass because she never asked Mary Anne if she wanted to be a bridesmaid, but most of all, she never talked to Carol or her dad about this. I'm sorry, but why the fuck would Carol want Mary Anne to be a bridesmaid at her wedding? Inviting her is one thing, but why would she want the stepdaughter of her new husband's ex-wife in her wedding? Isn't that a little weird? Okay, so let's go through the whole ordeal. A lot happens in a span of a few pages.

Dawn shows Mary Anne the dress, telling her they're both bridesmaids which is news to Mary Anne because she had no idea since Dawn never told her. And Dawn just tells her she guessed she just assumed she would be one? WTF, Dawn? Why would Mary Anne assume she would be a bridesmaids at YOUR father's wedding. Your father, who she's only met once and who her father is now married to his ex-wife. Does anyone else think this is weird? Bueller? Bueller? However, Mary Anne seems to be more concerned about having to stand up front where everyone will be looking at her because she hates being the center of attention (despite the fact that everyone is paying attention to the bride and groom and when Dawn points this out to her, Mary Anne has the gall to get offended). I do think Mary Anne should not be thrilled about this, however, she's not thrilled for the wrong reason: she should not want to do it because it's just weird for her to be a bridesmaid at her stepmom's ex-husband's wedding. I'm just shocked nobody thinks this is a tad inappropriate. But she's just going on about she doesn't want to stand in front of forty or so people who will be in attendance. 

Mary Anne isn't thrilled about a beach wedding and would prefer a "normal wedding, at a church." You know, while re-reading these books, I've found Mary Anne to be very judgy. She also says she had never heard of a beach wedding which was a bit surprising to me. I don't live anywhere near a beach and even I've heard of beach weddings! I've never attended one, so they could be a terrible nuisance for all I know, but I think Mary Anne is being a bit whiny about the whole thing (the bold is my reactions): 

Where do you sit at a beach wedding? Are you supposed to stand the whole time? I'm assuming there's folding chairs, Mary Anne. Or yes, maybe you do stand if the ceremony is only a few minutes. What if sand gets in your shoes? Or do you go barefoot under your nicest outfit, holding your shoes in one hand? Maybe people wear flip-flops? I'm assuming most people going to a beach wedding would wear beachy dresses that go with flip-flops. Or nice sandals. And if you get sand in them, just take off  your shoes and let the sand out More questions: How can you see the bride if you're squinting in the sun and the wind is blowing your hair around? Well, that's what sunglasses are for and maybe tie your hair back?? That's what I would do if I were going to a beach wedding as someone in the wedding party or a guest! What do you do if surfers and tourists start gawking? Who really cares? IDK, I think it would be kind of cool that you're involved in something that everyone else is curious about.  And what about the music? Does someone bring an accordion? A harmonica? Who says it needs to be live music? 

Look, I get Mary Anne is a traditional girl, but good God, she's so whiny about the whole thing. The only thing I can sort of empathize with her about is that if she's "not totally covered from head to toe, and wearing a floppy hat, I end up looking like a carrot with hair." (Funny, didn't Mallory compare herself to looking like a "tomato with hair" when she blushes in SS #10?) I've been to a few church weddings in my time and while nice, I always just find them so formal and stuffy. I've always preferred outdoor weddings with a beautiful garden or body of water as a backdrop. 

While they're arguing about Mary Anne being a bridesmaid, Mary Anne lets it slips that she's not thrilled about the idea of a beach wedding and says, "I thought the wedding was going to be, you know, normal." Sheesh, way to be sensitive, Mary Anne. This, of course, makes Dawn incensed. But, like, literally two paragraphs later they make up. I don't know, if I were Dawn, I would have stayed pretty angry at Mary Anne for at least two chapters! 

Mary Anne later realizes that she should be honored to be a bridesmaid in the wedding of the man who used to be married to the woman who's now married to her father and who she has only met one other time in her life. She's now excited about it and vows to be the best bridesmaid. The fuck?

Later, while Jack and Carol are going over how the wedding will work, both Dawn and Mary Anne find out that they are only having a Maid of Honor and Best Man: Dawn and Jeff. The fact that Dawn didn't know this much earlier is a bit baffling to me. We get this weird narration from Mary Anne:

I was in shock. What was going on? First I wasn't a bridesmaid. Then I was. Now I wasn't again. Had Dawn made her plans without even talking to her dad? How could she do that to me? To tell you the truth, now I'd kind of gotten used to the idea. It would have been fun - standing up there with my sister, sharing her special day. Didn't I deserve to be a bridesmaid? Why hadn't Mr. Schafer asked me?

I'm sorry, but what the fuck is Mary Anne smoking and why is she acting so entitled about a wedding she really doesn't have any business being at in the first place? I almost feel like Mary Anne is caught up in the excitement of seeing Dawn and going to California (which I don't blame her for) that she doesn't realize just how weird it is for her (and Kristy and Claudia) to be at this wedding. Why the fuck would Mr. Schafer want her in the wedding? And really, wouldn't it be Carol deciding on her Maid of Honor and bridesmaid? And, no, Mary Anne, you do NOT deserve to be a bridesmaid at this particular wedding. I feel like a broken record, but why would she be asked to be a bridesmaid at a wedding where she's only met the bride and groom once and is only connected to them because she's the stepsister of the groom's daughter. Get off your high horse, Mary Anne. 

So Mary Anne gets angry at Dawn (again) because of this whole mix up. I do agree that Dawn should have known all of this before getting Mary Anne excited about being a bridesmaid (and I'm shocked that there wasn't a family meeting about this way before), but she is being absolutely ridiculous. She accuses Dawn that her dad doesn't like her (he's only met you once, your dimwit!) and claims, "Now it turns out no one cared about me in the first place." Oh, my God. It's moments like this when I really can't stand Mary Anne. She has this woe is me mentality that really grates. 

Dawn apologizes the next morning and says that she was so excited about them sharing this moment together that she "got all spacey." Then we get this weird WTF-ness from Mary Anne:

You know what picture popped into my mind? Sunglasses in an oatmeal canister in our house in Stoneybrook. Sharon had left them there. Dawn's mom. I thought about the ways my dad and I are alike - both super-organized and quiet and serious. Dawn was like her mom, too, in some ways. It was only natural. It didn't make what she did less hurtful. I mean, leaving sunglasses wasn't the same as messing up wedding arrangements. But thinking about that connection made me less angry. 

I'm sorry, but WHAT THE FUCK? When has Dawn ever been scatterbrained? She is probably the most organized of the group. In fact, I think she would have made a better secretary than Mary Anne because her handwriting is easier to read (IMO!) This makes absoluetly no sense. And Mary Anne knows this about Dawn. I think what actually happened is that Dawn got really excited about the wedding and took some matters in her own hand when she probably should have talked to, you know, the bride and groom first before making all these plans. Although, really, Jack and Carol, being the adults, should have talked about the wedding with Dawn and Jeff BEFORE it was two days before the wedding! 

You might be wondering why Mary Anne is wearing the pink nightmare of a bridesmaid dress on the front cover if she's not a bridesmaid. Well, she asks Dawn if she can still wear the dress because she likes it (Really, Mary Anne?) and Dawn loves the idea. Mary Anne did mention she packed a plaid dress for the wedding and while plaid doesn't really scream "beach wedding", I'm sure it was a hell of a lot better than that fuchsia monstrosity. 

We find out that when Dawn invites Claudia to the wedding in California, Claud says yes without getting her parents' permission first and they aren't very happy because it is expensive to fly across the country. They tell her she can't go, so she unhappily tells Dawn she can't go. Then Dawn calls back and tells Claudia that her dad wants to hire her for the wedding for her "artistic talents." He wants her to be a wedding consultant and she'd "be in charge of picking the flowers, decorating the house, maybe styling hair." Jack is even offering to pay half the cost of a round-trip plane ticket. I laughed when Dawn tells her, "You can stay at my house." Well, duh, no shit. I don't think they were planning on staying in a hotel! 

But, I'm sorry, no. No fucking way Jack Schafer is hiring a thirteen-year-old girl who he has only met ONCE to pick the flowers for the wedding, decorate the house, and do hair. If I were Carol, I'd be like, HELL NO. Dawn does tell Claud that Jack and Carol want friends and family involved "instead of hiring a lot of strangers." But isn't Claudia a stranger to Jack and Carol? They barely know Dawn's friends in Stoneybrook. I just can't see Dawn' dad going out of his way to hire Claudia and pay for her ticket. So fucking ridiculous. But it works and Claud is allowed to go to California with Kristy and Mary Anne. 

I was horrified when Claudia is taking pictures of the reception party that's held in Jack's backyard. But then she says Jack and Carol had hired a professional photographer and they asked Claud to take some candids. Whew! For a second there, I thought they had hired a thirteen-year-old to be the wedding photographer!

Claudia does Dawn's, Kristy's, and Mary Anne's hair for the wedding. I can't seem to find it, but I swear I read that Carol has her hair done by someone else (a professional or a trusted friend, I assume). 

Claudia's spelling is pretty atrocious in this.  Person = "persin" (oh, my brain hurts!); valuable = "valubile", skills = "skcills" (this one especially baffles me!); enormous = "enormis"; buffet = "buffay" (okay, I can let her get away with that since the "t" is silent!); taste = "taist"; chocolate = "chocklit" (heh, I'm pretty sure that's how I spelled it when I was 7/8);  

Kristy also attends the California wedding, but doesn't really have anything to do with it. Instead, she's helping Sunny plan a good-bye party for Dawn. Kristy, Mary Anne, Claudia, Dawn, Maggie, Jill, and Sunny are all hanging out at Sunny's hose under the guise of a We Love Kids Club meeting (pretty sure they don't even book any jobs during this time) and Sunny makes Dawn go down to the kitchen to get some healthy snacks. While she's out of the room, Sunny tells the East Coast girls that she's planning a surprise going-away party for Dawn on Sunday. Even though she's not leaving until the next week, Sunny is doing it for that day because she wants to make sure the BSC girls are there (even though they're not saying goodbye to her, but that's just my little nitpick; in fact, you could say they're saying hello to her. As in, "Say hello to your friends!") and Dawn will be too busy with last-minute stuff. Sunday happens to be the day the Stoneybrook girls are going back and why would you want to go to a party the same day you have to get to the airport and leave? Sunny says they'll have the party early, but I still wouldn't want to go to a party the same day I'm traveling home. 

It turns out Sunny hasn't done any planning for this party at all. She doesn't know what time it's going to be and she hasn't thought about food, drinks, decorations, or activities. We find out that Sunday is only two days away which means the BSC girls aren't out there too long. (I think this is the first or second day they're there). It also means it only gives Sunny less than 48 hours to plan this party that she's not organized for. Since Kristy doesn't have to help with the wedding, she ends helping Sunny organize the good-bye party for Dawn. Hmm, do you think Sunny would still have this party if she knew Daw would move back to California about eight books later? 

Kristy thinks Dawn knows about the party since after the wedding reception Sunny tells her, "See you at the party." But later, we find out from Dawn she was totally surprised. The plan is that they're all going to Sunny's house where they are all meeting to go to brunch. But, of course, there is no brunch. There's a surprise party waiting for Dawn! Besides the WLKC girls (and half the BSC), there's also some other kids from Dawn's school and the kids she baby-sits for, who we all met in California Girls! I had to laugh when Kristy notes how Dawn and everyone else is sad and crying and Kristy narrates, "I was sad, but I couldn't cry. I mean, I was going to see Dawn in Stoneybrook the next week." 

There's even a cake that's made to look like Dawn's face - complete with blonde hair, sunglasses, and freckles. Wait, Dawn has freckles? Heh, this reminds me that when I moved to a different state when I was 7, I also had a going away party with friends (not a surprise party, though) and I, too, had a cake made into my face and God, was it just atrocious! I still cringe thinking about it. 

It's a banana cake with frosting and shockingly Dawn says that she loves it. Of course, she could be saying that to spare Stephie Robertsons' feeling as she was the one who made the cake with her dad. I personally am not a fan of frosting as it is way too sweet and I am not a health food nut like Dawn, so I call shenanigans that she would actually like the cake. She was probably frantically brushing her teeth when she got home! Speaking of cake, it is mentioned there is a carrot cake for the wedding cake. But just because it's carrot cake, is it really all that healthy? There's still frosting and sugar. 

Kristy is especially obnoxious besides she brings her referee whistle and uses it the morning of the wedding when everything is frantic and everybody is getting ready and after she blows the whistle, she tells everyone to get in the car. Good fucking lord. If I were Jack or Carol, I would have to restrain myself from strangling her with the cord. Not only is Kristy just being plain rude and using her whistle INSIDE the house which she is a GUEST in, but there are caterers who are also at the house getting things ready for the reception after the wedding. Just so fucking obnoxious to do that and there was absolutely no need for it. Yes, things were hectic, but I'm pretty sure they didn't need some thirteen-year-old child they've only met once to blow her loud-ass whistle and direct people to the car. 

She will use the whistle again during the farewell party when she has to get everyone's attention to tell them it's time for the BSC girls to head to the airport. At least she had the good sense not to use it at the wedding or reception, but still, so obnoxious using it in those instances. 

That's it for all the BSC members who were in California, but before I head back to Stoneybrook, I should mention that Jeff narrated a couple of chapters. He is worried about Mrs. Bruen, their housekeeper. He thinks once Carol moves in, his dad will no longer need a housekeeper. I was a bit surprised when Jeff tells us his dad hired Mrs. Bruen because he (Mr. Schafer) is a slob. I always had it in my mind that he was pretty organized and that was a huge reason why he and Sharon got divorced, because he couldn't stand her scatterbrained-ness. I always assumed he hired Mrs. Bruen because he needed someone to watch Jeff while he was at work and cook meals when he got too busy. Sure, the extra housework was a bonus, but I never got the impression that Mr. Schafer was a slob. Jeff is also worried because Carol has so much stuff that she will be bringing with her when she moves into the house and most of her stuff is "ugly". 

It turns out that Jeff doesn't have to worry about either thing because Mrs. Bruen is not leaving; in fact her hours are getting doubled. By the way, how old do you think Mrs. Bruen is supposed to be? Have we ever been told that? I would guess early-mid fifties. It also turns out the moving van containing all of Carol's possession was stolen and found halfway to San Diego "stripped and completely empty." Carol doesn't mind because she never liked the furniture in the first place. So why didn't she just sell it if she didn't like it, especially since she was moving? Duh. 

Meanwhile, in Stoneybrook, Stacey is a bridesmaid for Mrs. Barrett. It isn't as weird as you might think (okay, maybe it is). One of her bridesmaids had to cancel, so she asks Stacey to fill in. It seems weird that she would ask a thirteen-year-old baby-sitter who she doesn't seem particularly close to. I know Stacey was the one who went with the Barretts to Sea City, but I always think of Dawn as being the closest to the Barretts, but obviously Dawn couldn't be in this wedding so I guess Stacey was the next best thing. You know what else is weird? That Mrs. Barrett keeps getting referred to as "Mrs. Barrett". That's her ex-husband's name and the woman is about to get married. I understand that it would take too much time to refer to her as "the future Mrs. Dewitt" each time (btw, I should tell you that her fiancé and his kids had Harris as a surname in SS 10, but are now the Dewitts, the name I have always known them as. I should also tell you that one of his children, Ryan DeWitt, also has the same name as one of Dawn's baby-sitting charges in California. This is addressed in this book and Kristy tells us there is no relation between the two. I still want to know how this happened, especially since the Stoneybrook DeWitts used to be the Harrises. At least they're lucky that the two Ryan DeWitts live in different states) and since the BSC never refers to their clients by their first names, they can't call her "Natalie". IDK, I just thought it was weird, but maybe I'm making too big a deal out of it. I believe in future books she is referred to as Mrs. DeWitt, but her kids kept their last name. 

So Stacey is clearly the youngest bridesmaid, with the other three being in their thirties. Stacey comments how much the women make her laugh as they're getting ready and says "It was like a BSC meeting, only older." You poor thing Stacey, and you'll never get to make it to your thirties, a much better age to be then a 13-year-old, because you will always be stuck in the same age! 

We see a picture of Stacey in her bridesmaid dress and from what I can tell from the black and white illustration, it looks much better than Dawn's. It appears to be a black velvet dress with a gold or silver stash around her waist (okay, the pic is in black and white, but I'm pretty positive the sash isn't some bright jewel color). I think the dress looks pretty good, especially for a winter wedding in Connecticut. (Have I even mentioned this book takes place in December?) I have never attended a wedding in the winter, all of the weddings I've been to have been held between May-September. In the picture, Stacey is going down the aisle with a guy named Greg, one of the groomsmen (though she refers to him as an usher). She says they gave each other a smile, but is quick to tell us, "don't worry, he was my dad's age". I guess she had to clarify that for us since she pretty much falls in love with any boy with a pulse. I have to laugh because Greg looks very similar to Nicolas Cage in the drawing. 

While the wedding is going on, Mallory and Shannon are watching the children. Ryan DeWitt, the two-year-old, starts crying out for his dad. He's also been acting cranky and Shannon knows it's time for his nap, so she carries him, planning to take him to the nurses, which is off to the side of the church (you think it would be in the basement). While trying to get there, she ends up going down the aisle while Stacey and Greg are walking down it together. Stacey thinks she wants to give Ryan to her, which would have been hilarious. But instead, Shannon turns around and finds her way to the nursery. We get a chapter from her right before this one. 

But that's not the only mishap to happen during the wedding with the kids. When Mrs. Barrett and Franklin -(wait, why do BSC refer to Franklin by his first name, but can't call Mrs. Barrett Natalie? Screw it, I'm going to call her Natalie! BTW, I don't know if she's ever referred to by her first name in any other books, but she is called "Natalie" by Franklin, so kudos to the Neflix series for picking that up...unless it's in The Complete Guide to the Baby-Sitters Club). When Natalie and Franklin are at the altar, Marnie toddles up to them and throws her arms around her mom's leg, which is actually pretty adorable. She ends up staying during the entire ceremony, so I'm guessing it wasn't a very long one! 

Speaking of the Barrett children, they are moving to a new house and Suzi, who has a couple chapters, is worried that Santa Claus won't know they moved and they won't get their presents. Suzi decides to leave a trail of cookie crumbs from her old house to her new one. Yes, you read that right. She says she was inspired by Hansel and Gretel, but called them dumb because they left bread crumbs, which birds eat. Yeah, and you don't think animals won't eat cookie crumbs? I realize Suzi is only five, but kudos to Natalie for going along with her daughter's idea, because I sure wouldn't have. I would have told her that Santa knows everything, including when a kid moves and not to worry and if, for some reason, Santa didn't bring any toys, then I would take them to Toys R Us. Or something.

Mallory and Ben Hobart get into what might possible by the stupidest fight ever. It all starts when Mallory is hanging out with Ben and his brothers at his house and  Jamie Newton, Myriah Perkins, Nina Marshall, Jake Kuhn, Charlotte Johanssen, and Becca Ramsey come over. The kids (and yes, I'm including Mal and Ben as they are also kids!) are drinking hot cocoa and start singing Christmas carols. All the kids think it would be fun to go caroling and Mal and Ben agree to take them next Saturday, which is the Saturday before Christmas. Everyone is excited about it and that is that.

When Mal gets home, she receives a phone call from Claudia (this is before she went to CA) telling her that Natalie needs two sitters for the wedding. She was able to get Shannon, but hasn't been able to find anyone else so Mal tells her she'll do it. After she hangs up, she realizes that the wedding is on Saturday, the same day she and Ben are supposed to take all those kids caroling. Ruh-roh! She's about to call Claudia to tell her she can't do it, but realizes that would be unprofessional, so instead she calls Ben to explain what happened and he tells her to cancel it. Kind of an assy thing for him to do. And I've always liked Ben. It is just ridiculous how angry he gets over caroling. But-- GOOD LORD, WHY DON'T THEY JUST GO ON ANOTHER DAY? Maybe Friday or Sunday night? It's not that big of a deal. Just call those kids and tell them the new plan. NOT a big deal to get so pissy about. And that is exactly what happens. After her wedding sitting gig, Mal calls Ben to apologize, even though she has nothing to apologize for, IMO. Natalie needed two baby-sitters for her wedding, which, I'm sorry, Ben, is more important than taking a few kids caroling, so Mal said she would do it. What is so wrong about that? Ben even mentions that it wasn't a big enough deal to break up over and that they could have gone caroling another day. WELL, NO SHIT, SHERLOCK! THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING ALL ALONG! And guess what? They decide to go caroling the next day. You can't see me, but I just smacked my hand across my forehead. Good God, I just can't. I told you this was the stupidest fight ever. 

So they all go caroling, including Mal's siblings and everyone has so much fun and gets offered cookies and cake and hot cocoa by pretty much house they go to.

Jessi is the only BSC member who has nothing to do with either wedding. Even Shannon and Logan, who get chapters, are involved with the Barrett/DeWitt children whether it's watching them at the wedding (Shannon, as I already mentioned) or baby-sitting them (Logan). Instead, she ends up playing Santa Claus at Bellairs because the original one they hired got cast in a movie (how the hell did some nobody mall Santa from Stoneybrook end up being cast in a movie??). Stacey is the one who tells the girls since her mom works at Bellairs and since everyone beside Jessi will be busy/out of town next weekend, Jessi is the one who gets stuck at a gig. I find it hard to believe that Bellairs couldn't find anyone else and had to rely on the BSC to help them out. Give me a break. I also find it super weird that Jessi is Santa. Not because she's black. If Ben Hobart, a white male played Santa, I would also think it weird. Because he's an eleven-year-old child. And an eleven-year-old playing Santa, no matter what gender or race, is just plain weird. 

Jessi is worried about playing Santa, but in the end has a lot of fun and even stays at the department store longer as Santa. It's pretty clear the ghost writer (Peter Lerangis) had no idea what to do with Jessi and just tossed her this throwaway storyline. Honestly, it sounds like Natalie and Franklin could have used a third baby-sitter at their wedding!

Memories

BSC Super Special #11, The Baby-sitters Remember, is structured a little differently than other Super Specials. Instead of the girls' chapters being sporadicly placed, we get all the Kristy chapters together, all the Stacey chapters together, etc. (Mind you, nobody gets more than three chapters). They're all at a sleep over at Kristy's house when the subject of what their most vivid memory is comes up. Wait, scratch that. They're not all there. This is during the time when Dawn has temporarily moved to California (before she will permanently move there. I never understood why she just couldn't wait five years, then go there for college. Oh, right, because she will never age out of being 13!) On the cover, I was trying to decipher which one was Stacey and which one is Dawn, but turns out the other blonde is Shannon who is at the slumber party. And Shannon and Stacey look exactly alike, so I have no idea who is who! At least with Dawn, sometimes her hair style would be a little different the Stacey's so it was easy to tell them apart (not always, though!) Let's take a closer look at the cover:

Seriously, which one is Stacey and which one is Shannon? How can you differentiate between the two? I'm going to guess Stacey is on the bed, next to Claudia (you know, since they're best friends, it would make sense they're on the bed together. Does that logic make any sense?) and Shannon is the one having her hair brushed by Claudia. It would make sense that Claudia would want to brush her hair since Shannon doesn't really hang out with the girls on a regular basis, so I can see Claudia wanting to experiment with "new" hair. I don't really have any issues with the pajamas except for Claudia's and Mary Anne's. Claudia's don't look like pajamas: they look like regular clothes! It looks like she's wearing an oversized green top with black leggings. I suppose they are comfortable to wear to bed, so I can't fault her for that. Sometimes I wear a comfy everyday top with leggings or yoga pants to bed. Mary Anne is the only one wearing a nightgown (and it looks really long...I bet she trips on that thing when she has to get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom). I haven't worn a nightgown since I was five years old! (Mine was white with flowers on it). I feel like only little girls and old ladies wear nightgowns. 

So anyway, every member of the BSC (including Shannon and Logan) talk about their most vivid memory. Being that they're all only 13 years old (or 11, in the case of Jessi and Mal), most of them don't take place all that long ago! In fact, many of their most vivid memories take place within the last couple years. 

You would think Kristy's most vivid memory would be starting the BSC, but thankfully we're spared the story of hearing about how she got the idea for the BSC. God knows we've heard it 50,000 times already. Kristy's most vivid memory IS baby-sitting related, because God forbid she has anything else in her life. It takes place when she's ten and it's about her first baby-sitting experience. (Does it really count if it's for your own brother?) Back then, Mrs. Thomas had a housekeeper name Mrs. Culp, who besides helping with the cooking and housework, would also watch David Michal (who is 4 at the time) so he wouldn't have to spend all day at day care. The problem was Mrs. Culp often just blew off her responsibilities and didn't even show up or would call Mrs. Thomas at the last minute to tell her she wouldn't be there. Let me tell you something: this is one of my biggest pet peeves. Nothing irritates me more than people who call into their job ALL. THE. TIME. And then they never get reprimanded for it or fired! I don't understand why Elizabeth kept dealing with this Mrs. Culp's shit for so long. (I'd be interested to know how old she's supposed to be). Yes, perhaps she didn't have any better alternative, but I would give Mrs. Culp two strikes, but the third time she pulled that stunt, I would have fired her ass! 

Mrs. Culp has called Mrs. Thomas one morning to tell her she won't be able to make it and Mrs. Thomas calls Mrs. Pike to ask her if she can pick up David Michael from day care and bring him home. She then asks Sam or Charlie if they can watch him until she gets home from work. (Why didn't she just ask Mrs. Pike if DM could stay at the Pikes' house? I'm sure they wouldn't notice one more kid!) Neither boy can watch their little bro and that's when Kristy tells her mom she could do it. After some hemming and hawing, Elizabeth agrees. 

They make the hugest deal out of this. Look, I was the youngest, so I never had the responsibility of watching a younger sibling, but by the time I was ten, I was definitely allowed to be home alone after school. Not that it happened a lot, but when it did, it was no big deal. Kristy only has to watch DM for two hours before her mom returns home from work and during those two hours this is how many people check up on them:

-Mrs Newton calls the minute Kristy gets home from school to asks what she's up to? (Gee, invasive much? Obviously, Elizabeth must have asked her to call the second Kristy got home.)

-Kristy's mom calls shortly after Mrs. Pike drops off DM. (Honestly, I'm surprised Mrs. Pike didn't come in to do an inspection and make sure the stove wasn't on!) 

-Mimi comes over to ask how everything is going and if she can help with anything. Not sure if Elizabeth asked her to do that, but obviously she must have told her that Kristy would be alone with DM. 

-Mrs. Newton calls AGAIN.

-Mrs. Pike calls.

-Mrs. Thomas calls again.

-Mary Anne has a baby-sitter (older lady from what I gather) and she and Mary Anne come over to check on Kristy and DM.

GOOD FUCKING LORD. Coddled, much? That would irritate me so much if I were Kristy. I can see Elizabeth calling them to make sure everything is fine and having a neighbor check on them, but all of that was so ridiculous! And nothing of note happens while Kristy is baby-sitting DM. She gives him a snack of apples and graham crackers with grape juice (yuck; grape juice!) Somehow, DM manages to skin his knee and cut his hand, but Super Sitter Kristy has him all cleaned up and bandaged by the time Elizabeth returns home from work. She is pleased with how everything went and I guess that's how Kristy got the baby-sitting bug. (Unlike Chris Parker, she does NOT have the baby-sitting blues!) The best part was when Mrs. Thomas fired Mrs. Culp. Thank God! Good riddance to her!

Stacey probably had my favorite section and her memory was the most heartbreaking. It takes place when she was eleven and still living in NYC. She's excited about starting her sixth grade year and she has a goal to make it her best year ever. (Spoiler alert: it won't be; oh, poor Stacey, my heart breaks for her). She plans to get straight A's, she plans to make new friends, and she plans to try out for the soccer team. The last one was a bit odd because I've never seen Stacey as the athletic type. I can't remember the book, but she and Claudia have to coach the Krushers for some reason and they're mostly interested in wearing cute uniforms than the actual game. Also, I don't remember her and Abby ever bonding over soccer. Lately, she's been hungry and especially thirsty, but her parents just attribute it to her being a growing girl. 

Stacey has a group of friends (let's be honest - it's more of a clique; a snobby exclusive clique. Stacey even comments that Laine started the group and gets to decide who gets to be in it) that includes Laine and other girls named Deirdre, Val, and Sally. There used to be a girl named Marty, but she's been sent to boarding school so there's an opening for a place in the Snobby Clique! That girl will be Allison who is from Texas and Stacey really likes her when they first meet. Laine does't like Allison at first, but once she finds out that she sucks just as much as Laine herself does, Laine thinks she's great! 

Deirdre has a slumber party planned for the group of friend (including Allison) the next Friday night. Stacey mentions that she's been feeling "funny"; "kind of dizzy and weird". She's still always hungry and thirsty. By the time she reaches Deirdre's apartment, she feels shaky, but is determined not to miss this sleepover. I think by this point, maybe it's time to tell her parents her symptoms! 

Everything seems normal at first for a sleepover. The girls eat pizza and drink soda while watching a movie (on the VCR; snicker, snicker). The movie is something that Deirdre's dad told them they would like, but they just thought it was "weird and old". I'm guessing it's some movie from the '70s. Probably some Stanely Kubrick movie. Not sure which 13 year old girl would like that! I'd be curious to know what it was supposed to be!

Stacey and Laine end up sharing Deirdre's bed (the girls draw straws to see who would get it). Honestly, either the owner of the bed should sleep in the bed or all the girls should sleep in sleeping bags. I used to have sleepover around this age and I always slept in a sleeping bag. We never slept in my bedroom; we were usually in the family room or living room. But, this will be part of the drama that will soon begin to unfold, though I thought it was going to be Allison sharing the bed with Stacey instead of Laine. 

Even though Stacey had three slices of pizza and lots of soda, she's still hungry and thirsty and pigs out on some munchies. The girls go to sleep by one and at four, Stacey (who is having a dream about drinking sodas under a waterfall) is woken up by Laine who is shrieking and telling Stacey to wake up because she has wet the bed. Okay, I realize it would be gross to be in a bed that someone had peed in, but Laine is being super overdramatic and just a bitch in this scene. I can't imagine acting that way towards your so-called best friend. Laine is making such a scene that she not only wakes up the other girls in the room, but also Deirdre's parents and her little brother. Laine is calling her disgusting, a baby, and will go on to ignore her. I know Stacey and Laine will make up (before they're not friends again), but honestly Laine is such a fucking bitch that I kind of wish Stacey had never forgiven her. This is the scene where we also find out Allison is a mean girl bitch as well and I guess she and Laine must bond over this shared trait of theirs.

Stacey calls her parents who come to pick her up. Stacey (rightly) thinks something is wrong with her body, but her parents thinks she has a psychological problem, which is pretty infuriating. Stacey does tell them, she doesn't feel well and I assume she tells them her symptoms, so I'm not sure why they don't listen to her. Instead they take her to a "fancy child psychiatrist." Stacey wishes that the child psychiatrist was an actual child because they would understand bed-wetting more than an adult. Yeah, but at least this person went to school and did all the work and earned the credentials to understand children and become a child psychiatrist. Kind of a moronic statement for Stacey to make. Anyway, this doctor is smart enough to ask Stacey more questions to further grasp what is going on. He asks her if this was the time first time she wet the bed recently and she admits it wasn't. He asks other questions about how she's been feeling lately and comes to the conclusion that she might have diabetes and recommends that she see her pediatrician immediately, like that same day. At least Stacey's parents take him seriously. 

Of course Stacey does have diabetes and is learning to cope with her new way of life. It's still not easy because she misses school and gets behind in her schoolwork. Everyone at her school treats her like a pariah and call her a hyprocondriac because they think she's just pretending to be sick. When her dad tells her he got a job in Connecticut, she is more than happy to move. Good riddance to those bitches, I say! 

I've never read The Summer Before (the prequel to the BSC that AMM wrote), but I know Stacey is in the book. I think she is still living in New York, so I'd be curious to see what is going on in her life then. 

Claudia's most vivid memory takes place when she is six years old; the youngest age anyone's memory takes place. I had a lot of issues with Claudia's segment; a lot of it didn't ring true to me. So basically it's established that Claudia loves her box of 64 Crayola crayons with the sharpener in the back (heh, I remember those!) She loves to color and make pictures which the Kishis' fridge is covered with. It is also established that Claudia doesn't pay attention during school and fidgets a lot (well, she is only six!) Her only bright spot about the school day is art class which comes at the end of the day. They have their regular teacher, Mrs. Frederickson, who sounds like a mean old hag, and they have an art teacher, Miss Packett, who, um, also sucks. Now, when I was in first grade, I just had one teacher who taught all the subjects. (I do remember our class trading rooms with the other first grade class and that teacher would teach us some subject...couldn't tell you what it was!) If we worked on an art project (don't ever remember doing art in first grade, but I'm sure we must have!), then our teacher would have been the one giving out instructions. We didn't have any special teacher come in just to teach art class! Also, we will soon find out that Miss Packett SUCKS as a human being and especially as a so-called art teacher. 

Miss Packett gives their class homework one day. I am going to quote exactly what she said:

"Your homework is to color a self-portrait. I want each of you to make yours at home because I want you to be able to work on it in peace. I want you to draw yourself the way you see yourself, not the way your friends see themselves. This must be your own work."

When Mary Anne raises her hand to ask a question (kind of surprised that shy six-year-old Mary Anne would do that!), Miss Packett interrupts her and says:

"I want you to draw whatever you want to draw."

Again, she says:

"I want you to draw whatever you want to draw."

I hate this bitch. Their portraits will be due the next day. They will need to hand them into Mrs. Frederickson in the morning, then they will all look at them that afternoon. 

Of course, Claudia is very excited and can't wait to get started. She's also very proud that she has homework which is actually kind of cute. For two hours, she draws the outline of a butterfly body and fills it in with "stripes and splotches and spots" and uses almost every one of the 64 crayons. (She probably only used sixty!) Little Claudia is so proud of her butterfly. Little does she know, a See You Next Tuesday of a teacher will squander that feeling. 

Fast forward the next day to art class. All the students have rolled up their projects, so when Miss Packett unrolls each one and shows them to the class, this is the first time anyone is seeing everyone else's work. All the kids had drawn a face (sometimes with a body) with hair and eyes and a mouth and nose. Claudia begins to "have a funny feeling in [her] stomach." When Miss Packett unrolls Claudia's drawing, she asks who it belongs to because Claudia had forgotten to put her name on it. Miss Packett asks if it's some kind of joke...which I don't understand. If it was supposed to be a joke, I think Claudia would go for something more immature...like a farting dog? IDK! She pretty much reprimands Claudia and says she can't do anything seriously. Hey, you fucking bitch, you told the students, "I WANT YOU TO DRAW WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DRAW!!!" 

I do find it hard to believe a teacher, especially one who works with six-year-olds would berate one of her students over an ART PROJECT. Isn't art subjective, anyway? You would think a TRUE teacher who loved children and had a passion for art would LOVE that Claudia thought outside the box and drew a butterfly as her self-portrait. Clearly, when it comes to art, Claudia is a genius. Also, maybe she should have made her instructions a little more clearer! Did I mention I hate that bitch? 

So because of this bitch, Claudia is upset and comes home crying. Sweet Mimi, who has always been an advocate for Claudia, wants to know what happened and Claud tells her. She claims she is dumb because she didn't understand the instructions. We get Awesome Mimi next:

Mimi had set her mouth in a firm line She stood up. She took my hand in hers. And she said, "Oh, no, my Claudia. That is not true at all. You understood the directions better than anyone else."

They go to the school where Mimi confronts Miss Packett and says to her:

"Miss Packett, I would like you please to respect my Claudia's intelligence and imagination. She told me what happened in school today, and I believe you are mistaken. Of all your students, Claudia is the only one who truly understood your assignment. You asked the children to draw themselves the way they see themselves. And my Claudia sees herself as a free spirit, like a butterfly. So that is what she drew."

Then Mimi drops the mic and walks away. YEAH, YOU GO, MIMI! Everything she said was true, so shove it up your butt, Miss Shitty Teacher. She does apologize to Claudia the following Monday, so at least she had the decency to do that.

I was a bit shocked that Jessi's most vivid memory did not involve dancing. No, it it about the birth of her brother, so she is nine and living in Oakley, NJ. We find out that before Squirt was born, Jessi's parents had tried for a third baby twice, but Mrs. Ramsey had had a miscarriage both times. Jessi does not want the baby because she know he will just pretty much disrupt her life with crying and smelly diapers and that everything is going to change. (She sure changes her tune in Jessi's Baby-Sitter when she thinks her mom is pregnant again and is thrilled!) 

Jessi is also mad because Becca will be moving into her room so the baby will have his own room. Neither girl is happy and I don't blame them one bit. I would have hated to share my room. I was lucky that I always had my own room growing up. It was just my brother and me, so we both had rooms of our own. Jessi is smart and knows better than to say anything about not wanting another sibling (she isn't totally insensitive! She also doesn't want to jinx the baby.) and not to whine about the room situation (though Becca does! But, to be fair, she is only six when this is going on). 

The baby is due in four weeks, but looks like Mrs. Ramsey is going to be giving birth a bit earlier much to Jessi's dismay. Aunt Cecelia is summoned to take care of the girls while their parents are at the hospital. Neither girl is too excited about their little brother (poor guy!) and don't care for his nickname, which I kind of have to agree. "Squirt", like "moist" is just a gross word. And it should not be used as a nickname for anybody. Why not just call him Johnny? Or JP (for John Phillip). That would be cute. 

Squirt is a crier; he seems to cry abnormally more than other babies. Turns out he has colic. I'm glad Jessi looked it because I don't really know what it is. Jessi (and I) find out it involves "infants who might cry for hours on end...the cause of colic was very bad stomachaches, which doctors don't really know the cause of." Ugh, that sounds terrible. Terrible for the baby. And terrible for everyone living in the house with that crying baby. 

One day (Jessis' most vivid is coming up!), Jessi finds herself alone with Squirt who is crying his little head off. Technically, Mrs. Ramsey is home too, but she's sleeping (that poor woman...she needs all the rest she can get!) Jessi is just waiting for her mom to hear her brother and get up, but she never does, so Jessi realizes she's going to have to console him. She must have the Midas touch because she rocks him and sings him songs from Annie and soon his cries fade away until they stop altogether. It is a very sweet scene. Mrs. Ramsey even sees this and comments that Jessi is the only one to calm Squirt down. Clearly, Jessi was meant to be a member of the BSC! 

Okay, I just thought of something I've never given any thought to until now. Jessi and Becca sharing a room in their NJ house made me think of this. When they move to Stoneybrook, they move into the McGill's old house. Now I'm pretty sure Jessi and Becca have their own rooms in this house. I remember a book where Jessi is baby-sitting for Jamie Newton and it must be close to Halloween because he's scared of ghosts, so Jessi takes him to her house to show him some Casper the Friendly Ghost books that Becca has and she mentions they go to Becca's room. I've come to the conclusion that their Stoneybrook house must have five bedrooms: one for the parents, one for Jessi one for Becca, one for Squirt, and a guest room that Aunt Cecelia will eventually get when she moves in with them. I'm pretty sure Aunt Cecelia has her own room; I don't remember her having to sleep in the den or anything. So this means the McGills lived in a five-bedroom house? WTF? Why? They only need three bedrooms: one for the parents, one for Stacey, and a guest room. MAYBE four bedrooms if they wanted a guestroom and an office for Ed, but why would they need five bedrooms? Or maybe it was three or four bedroom and the Ramsey did some renovation and added more rooms? Has anyone ever given any thought to this? Inquiring minds want to know! 

Logan's most vivid memory is meeting Mary Anne for the first time and we get his perspective from (some of) the events of Logan Likes Mary Anne! Turns out that book should've been called Logan Stalks Mary Anne! Yikes! His family has just moved to Stoneybrook from Louisville and it's his first day at SMS. He makes friends with Pete Black and Rick Chow and Alan Gray and all the SMS 8th grade boys who have lines in the BSC books and when he sees Mary Anne for the first time, he has "no idea why [he is] so drawn to her." He doesn't want to ask his new friends about her because he's embarrassed they'll give him a hard time about it. So instead he decides to follow her. He follows her out of the cafeteria, but she ends up going to the girls' room. He comments he was too embarrassed to wait around outside for her. Yeah, it also makes you look like a weird creep-o too. Did you ever consider that, Logan? Then he follows her again and she just goes into a classroom (well, duh, you're at school, dumbass). I don't know why anyone thinks it's okay to follow somebody. This actually happened to me when I was in my early twenties. I was at the movies by myself and this guy fucking followed me home! I'm not sure if he was at the same movie I was or at a different one and saw me in the parking lot when I was leaving. I didn't realize I was being followed until I got to my apartment's parking lot and he approached me and admitted he saw me at the movies and followed me. I honestly can't remember everything he said because a)it happened a while ago and b)I was so freaked out I was only half listening. He must have asked me out and I probably said "no thanks" and walked away. (I should point out that my front door was on the opposite side of the parking lot so thank God he didn't see where I lived!) I think he realized he freaked me out and hopefully he learned his lesson not to fucking follow people! I realize that I am very lucky nothing happened to me; it could have been much, much worse. But, yeah don't fucking follow/stalk people. Not. Cool.

So Logan finally just asks the guys what the girl's name is and they tease him about it, but they tell him how Mary Anne is shy and she belongs to the BSC and all that. We then get his POV when he joins the girls at lunch to tell them he's baby-sat before, the meeting he attends where everyone is embarrassed by his presence (Logan included), and when he baby-sits for the Rodowskys with Mary Anne. There's really nothing new being added here with seeing it from Logan's view. I think it would have been more interesting to get his view of the dance they attend or Stacey's party that turns into a surprise party for Mary Anne. C'mon, give me something juicy! Baby-sitting is really not it.

Mallory has a cute memory. It's when she is ten (and still getting baby-sat for by the BSC, hehe) and she decides to write to her favorite author, Amelia Moody. She gets the idea from Mary Anne (who is baby-sitting the Pikes that day with Claudia). Mary Anne tells her how she can find the address of the publishing company at the front of the book. Heh, I have to wonder how many kids read this chapter and decided to write to Ann M. Martin. Funnily enough, I never wrote to her (or any author, for that matter) even thought I was (still am!) a huge book nerd. I used to write to Pleasant Company all the time and I would get postcards back from them, answering my questions. (I still have them!) I remember I had this teddy bear calendar that would pose the stuffed animals in cute scenes and they used many of the American Girl doll accessories because they were the perfect size. I totally narced on them and told PC about this, but I don't think they cared because I got a postcard back saying something along the lines of, "You're right; the accessories are the perfect size for that teddy bear calendar" or something like that. I also wrote to Purina (and included a photo of my cat eating it from his bowl; they thanked me for sharing it with them and returned it since they thought I'd want to keep it) and they wrote me back to tell me they're glad my cat enjoys Purina Premium brand cat food and appreciated that I took the time to write to them. (Heh, I have to wonder if they knew an eleven-year-old was writing them. I assume my handwriting gave it away!) They included some coupons for more Purina cat food. But yeah, I'm surprised I never thought about writing an author! 

Mary Anne says she once wrote to Louisa May Alcott and I would love to know how old she was when this happened. How did she not know she was dead? Obviously the book was written in the 1800s. I always thought Mary Anne to be fairly smart; I don't buy that she would think the author of Little Women was still alive. Now Claudia, maybe (if she read the book and wanted to write the author!) Even Vanessa doesn't realize that Louisa May Alcott is dead because she doesn't understand why Mary Anne and Mal are laughing over it. WTF, isn't Vanessa supposed to be a big bookworm like her sister? At least Mal knew she was deceased. 

So Mal writes to Amelia Moody and includes her school photo. Four weeks go by and she gets a form letter from the author who has added in her own handwriting (I guess it could have been an assistant, but I think we're made to believe it was from Ms. Moody herself) telling Mallory that she will be at a bookstore in Washington Mall signing books on May 2nd from noon to two. Hey, isn't that Mal's birthday? They don't mention that at all, which is kind of surprising since she is ten during this, so she could have turned 11 (and stay there for the rest of her life! God, what torture to be eleven for the rest of your life!) 

Mal decides to wear the same outfit she's wearing in her school photo so Ms. Moody will be able to recognize her. (Doe Mal not realize how many letters she probably gets?) She also has a whole spiel planned to say when she meets Ms. Moody:

"Hi. My name is Mallory Pike. I wrote you a letter and you wrote back. I'm the one with seven brothers and sisters. And I said was our number one fan."

Okay, so I can maybe see mentioning the thing about her siblings because that is unique, so maybe Ms. Moody MIGHT remember that (if she did indeed actually read the original letter!) But good Lord, Mal, I'm sure everyone says they are her number one fan. 

Mrs. Pike tells Mal that it's going to be a mother-daughter day which is very sweet. After the signing, they'll have lunch and do some shopping at the mall. But being the extremely lax parent that she is, she tells Mal that they won't be leaving until 11:30. Okay, what the fuck, Dee? The thing starts at noon and I remember reading in another book (Snowbound, maybe?) that it TAKES half an hour to drive to Washington Mall! So what a fucking shock when they get there (they reach the mall at noon) and Mal sees "a line of kids woud around and around the store and then stretched partway down the mall." Mrs. Pike is shocked by this. Well, what the fuck did you expect, DEE? This is a big time author who has lots of fans who probably came from all over Connecticut (and probably surrounding states as well). You don't fucking get to a big event at the time it's supposed to start...no, you get there at least an hour in advance to insure you're near the front of the line. Any fucking idiot knows that. Ugh, this reminds me when I saw a movie (can't remember which one it was, but I'm sure it was some popular one because the theater was packed) and some stupid idiot with a couple of her kids comes in ten minutes after the previews started and is shocked she can't find a seat. Well, WTF do you expect when it's the opening day of some Harry Potter or Marvel movie? (I don't think it was one of those, but just giving an example). I bet Mrs. Pike is like that. If I was Mal, I would be LIVID. Luckily, though the line moves quickly and she is able to meet Ms. Moody, who has a new book out that Mrs. Pike agrees to buy for her daughter and will be the one that the author will sign. 

By the time Mallory gets to Amelia Moody, she can't remember her prepared speech and ends up bursting into tears. Oh, that poor dear. I assume it's because she's so overwhelmed with happiness, but I have to wonder if she got social anxiety and was so upset that she messed up what she had prepared in her head that she burst into tears? Anyway, I do feel a little bad for her because I have social anxiety too and I don't think I could talk to anyone I admired for fear I would sound like a moron. 

While reading Shannon's most vivid memory, all I could think of was, Really, Shannon? This is your most vivid memory? Aren't you filthy rich? Wouldn't an amazing European trip be a vivid memory for you? Aren't you an overachiever at school? Surely one of those award you've won was a vivid memory for you. 

It takes place at the beginning of the school year and there's a new girl at school named Sally White (is this the same Sally that was part of Stacey's friend group?) who everyone is enamored with because she's rich and glamorous (isn't everyone else rich at Shannon's school?) She's from London and her mom is a movie star. Why would a movie star move to Stoneybrook? Yeah, yeah, I know Derek Masters lived there, for like a month, but he was from there so at least it made a little sense. Shannon has other friend named Meg, Greer, Polly, and Lindsey. Sally just hangs out with Meg first and nobody else. Then she dumps Meg because Meg acted over excited when she and Sally went to a Bruce Springsteen concert and Sally told Meg she was acting like a baby. Meg gets replaced by Greer for a few days.

Meanwhile, Shannon wants to join the astronomy club, but needs to pass a test before she can join. She's supposed to be studying for it one weekend when Sally calls her and invites her over. (Not sure what Greer did; Sally probably just got tired of her). Shannon accepts her invitation because she is intrigued by Sally. She spends pretty much the whole day at her house even though she knows she should be studying. On Sunday, Sally invites her over again and Shannon tells her she needs to study because it's important and Sally pretty much gives her an ultimatum: her or the astrology club. Shannon chooses to study. Heh heh. This means Shannon is out and Polly is chosen. And so the cycle continues. Shannon tells us the reason why she was so mean to Kristy when she first met her was because of Sally.

Dawn's most vivid memory is her parents' divorce. She has just turned twelve and has noticed her parents have been fighting a lot lately. It seems to be implied that Jack is having an affair because Sharon asks him (in a snotty tone) how late he will be tonight and he replies, "Late enough." Also, he doesn't even come home at all one night, he doesn't return until the next evening. I refuse to believe he's having an affair with Carol because I like Carol and I refuse to believe she would mess with a married man. I think it's just some floozy at his office, a stupid fling he's having and he meets Carol after he's gotten his divorce finalized.

Jack and Sharon drop the bomb on Dawn and Jeff that they're getting a divorce and Dawn pretty much sees this coming, but is devastated none the less. Of course Jack and Sharon start fighting during all of this and Jack says something to Sharon which makes her reply, "Thank you so much for correcting me in front of the children" and Jeff replies, "I'm not a child!" which made me laugh. Um, yes you are, you nimrod. You're ten-years-old. I mean, I guess if you don't want to be called a child, a tween could work. I've never liked Jeff; he's always seemed like one of those smug asshole precocious kids. 

Now I am not a child of divorce and I don't really know how custody works. Looking back at this, I am kind of surprised that Sharon got custody of both kids when she moves all the way across the country. I would think Jack would have been a better choice for the kids. He seems to be a stable guy with a steady income, and, to be truthful, you think not being scatterbrained like Sharon would work in his favor. Also, why would they want to tear Dawn and Jeff away from the place where they go to school and have friends and are familiar with their environment? You would think Mr. Schafer would get primary customary of them. However, if that were the case, no way Sharon ever moves back to Connecticut. I realize they need to get Dawn to move to Stoneybrook to join the BSC, but now that I think about it, I feel like the kids would have been granted custody to their dad if Sharon had decided to move to the East Coast. But like I said, I really don't know how all that works. 

So Dawn, Sharon, and Jeff move to Stoneybrook and they see their new house (that might have a secret passage! Spoiler alert: it does!) and she talks about her first day at school where she meets Mary Anne. I understand why Jeff moved back to California because he never fully adjusted to Stoneybrook, but it surprises me that Dawn did only because she loved her friends and the BSC and her house, and she seemed pretty close to her mother, not to mention she must have visited California at least 100 times during her eight grade year. She pretty much goes there every time there's a school break (which happens a lot in this time parallel!) 

Mary Anne's memory takes place when she is eight. Her dad calls a baby-sitting agency (but not the same one from book 3!) to hire baby-sitters for his daughter and Mary Anne never likes any of them. Richard has to go away for a weekend on a business trip to Chicago and needs to find someone to take care of Mary Anne. She asks if she can stay with Kristy or Claudia, which is what I'm thinking would be the logical thing, but Richard says he doesn't want to impose. My parents once went out of town for a week and I got to stay with my best friend's family and it was AWESOME. It was also during the school year which made it even more rebellious (because I was spending a school night at a friend's house). Not sure where my brother was during this time...he must have been at a friend's house too. My parents have also been out of town for a week and they hired this baby-sitter (older woman) from...somewhere and it was not awesome. She wasn't mean, but she was just strict and had rules and regulations and oh boy, it was not fun. Oh, and one time my best friend's parents went out of town for a week and she and her sister stayed with us and that was AWESOME. We would watch BSC videos and act them out and play with our American Girl dolls and my mom took us to an ice cream place where we ordered this thing called the Earthquake, which had, like, twenty scoops of ice cream. (Claudia would be so jealous!) We earned it because we cleaned our massive basement. 

Anyway, so Mr. Spier gets a woman named Mrs. Tate to watch Mary Anne. He knows Mary Anne isn't thrilled about this and asks her what would make it better and she asks if she can invite Kristy and Claudia over for a sleepover and he agrees because he knows that will make the weekend go quicker for her. 

I'm not a big fan of Mrs. Tate when we first met her. This is because when she first meets Mary Anne when she comes home from school, Mary Anne is only answering her questions in one or two words and Mrs. Tate asks her, "Cat got your tongue?" I fucking hate it when people say this. Why the fuck do people need to be Chatty Cathys or Gabby Gabbies? As a quiet, introverted person myself, that shit just infuriates me (and yes, I've had that said to me before). 

Mary Anne asks if she can have a brownie and Mrs. Tate tells her no since she'll be having pizza later and that's too unhealthy and she should have an apple instead. Good God, lady, it's Friday and she's a kid, let her have the damn brownie! Already she's reminding me of the strict baby-sitter I had! I have to laugh when Mary Anne goes over to Kristy to complain about Mrs. Tate and Kristy offers her a cookie, but Mary Anne doesn't take it because Mrs. Tate wouldn't let her have it. Mary Anne! Mrs. Tate isn't even there; take the damn cookie! Look, I was never a rebellious child and perhaps I could be a goody two shoes at times, but dang, even I would have taken the cookie. What she doesn't know won't kill her! Kristy has plans for revenge on Mrs. Tate that evening. Mary Anne isn't so sure about this and comments how Kristy's ideas can get them in trouble, "just like when we experimented with the washing machine." Okay, now that's a story I need to hear! What went on there?

Once Kristy and Claudia are over at the Spiers' for the sleepover, Kristy tells them the grand plan is to sneak down and put pepper in her food. Claudia and Mary Anne distract Mrs. Tate by pretending there's a spider and Kristy puts pepper on her salad. Surely, Mrs. Tate saw all this pepper, right? But Mary Anne comments that Mrs. Tate takes a bite and makes a face before she just dumps it out and makes a new salad. The girls continue to play pranks on the woman, including nailing her slippers to the floor and hanging a scary rubber mask in the fridge (okay, that would probably freak me out, not gonna lie! - and I'm going to assume it belonged to Sam or Charlie and Kristy brought it over). 

I have to give Mrs. Tate credit; she seems to be enjoying the jokes and even commends the girls on some of them, calling them creative. Mary Anne says Mrs. Tate told them about "a very wonderful practical joke - spreading plastic wrap over a toilet bowl so tightly that when someone sits down they don't know it's there and, well, you can imagine the rest." Yeah, Mary Anne, I wouldn't call that "very wonderful". I've heard of that joke and it just sound awful and disgusting and I would be pissed (for lack of a better word) if someone ever did that to me. Also, Mrs. Tate is walking into some dangerous territory by telling the girls that. I hope she at least checks the toilet before she uses it in the morning! 

And that is The Baby-sitters Remember! Cue Sarah McLachlan singing "I Will Remember You". 

Summer in the (Sea) City

BSC Super Special #10, Sea City, Here We Come! has a little bit of a different structure than the previous Super Specials. All the previous SSs had a prologue and an epilogue and they were "hosted" (for lack of a better word) by a BSC member who would narrate the prologue and epilogue. The "host" would also narrate the first and last regular chapters. There was also usually a reason for why the story was being told. Let's go through them, shall we:

-Baby-sitters on Board! is hosted by Kristy and she's making a scrapbook to give to her mom and Watson as a thank you for taking them on this trip.

-Baby-sitters' Summer Vacation is hosted by Stacey and she's making all her friends keep a journal of their experience at summer camp so she can keep as a memento.

-Baby-sitter's Winter Vacation is hosted by Mary Anne and she's making her friends keep a journal of their time at the lodge in Vermont so she can present it to Logan.

-Baby-sitters' Island Adventure and California Girls! are hosted by Dawn. In the former, she's gathering notes and journal entries from her friends about what everyone was going through during the incident.

-New York, New York! is hosted by Claudia. She wants her friends to keep a journal of their time in NYC so she can make it into a scrapbook for keepsake.

-Snowbound! and Baby-sitters at Shadow Lake are hosted by Kristy. In the former, she has her friends write about their experiences during the blizzard so she can send them to the newspaper and the latter is presented as a gift to Watson to show him how much the lake cabin means to their family.

-Starring the Baby-sitters Club! is hosted by Jessi and she's the sixth-grade correspondent who asks her friends and the cast and crew of the play to keep notes for her so she can write a piece about it the school newspaper.

You know what? There's no BSC member hosting this book. There is a prologue and an epilogue, but it's all handwritten notes and letters setting up/concluding the story. Kristy gets the first chapter and Mallory gets the last one. All the girls have previously hosted a SS. (More than one in the case of Kristy and Dawn!) All the girls...except for Mallory. Why not give her this book? This book would be perfect because it's her family who goes to Sea City ever summer and it's her family's beach house they'll all be staying at. Poor Mallory! (I'm beginning to understand why there's a book titled that!) She really does get the shaft all the time, doesn't she? I haven't looked ahead to the upcoming SSs, but I'll be interested to see if they're "hosted" by any BSC member or if that's a trend that stopped with this book. 

So obviously Sea City is a place we've been before in Boy-Crazy Stacey and Mary Anne and Too Many Boys. As far as I know, this book is the third and final time they go there (unless they go there in a mystery book or during the FF series). I love Sea City; it seems like my kind of beach town. It seems like a lovely little seaside town to visit. HOWEVER...I don't know if it's the best place to set a Super Special. A few of the girls have interesting storylines and there is a hurricane plot which helps pad the book and gives a couple of the girls who really have nothing to do a chance to narrate about the storm. There is absolutely no reason for all the girls to be in Sea City together. So, this is how they all end up there:

Mallory and Jessi are going to be the helpers for the Pikes. This kind of really doesn't make any sense since in Mary Anne and Too Many Boys, they made a point of saying that Mary Ann and Stacey were the helpers since the Pike parents wanted Mal to enjoy her vacation. I guess they decided to make her work instead! I hope they at least pay her! Also, I'm sure that the triplets just LOVE having baby-sitters who are only one year older than them! (Although if you've ever looked at the cover of Jessi and the Superbrat, Jessi looks like she's easily fifteen years older than the triplets!) 

Stacey is going to be the helper for the Barretts who have rented the beach house next to the Pikes. The two families will be spending two weeks there. Mal, Jessi, and Stacey will spend a week in Sea City before the other BSC members will join them. They (Logan is also included here) will be riding with Franklin Harris and his four kids. Who is Franklin Harris, you ask? Well, his kids are Lindsey, Taylor, Madeline, and Ryan. You probably know them betters as the DeWitts. They're the family who makes a blended family with the Barretts. At this time, Franklin is dating Mrs. Barrett. I have no clue if we've been introduced to the Harrises/DeWitts since I'm only on book 36 in the series and this takes place around book 65. From what it sounds like, we've already met them (there's no way the parents of the BSC would let their kids get a ride from a man they don't know even if he is the boyfriend of a client!), however I don't know if they were the Harrises or the DeWitts when we first meet them and why the surname changes. This is some terrible continuity! Stacey will be staying in the Barrett/Harris/DeWitt house since she's the helper for the Harris/DeWitt kids. The others will be staying in the Pike house. (How big is this house? We know it's three stories, but they have fifteen people staying in that house!) Also, I am SHOCKED that Richard is okay with Mary Anne and Logan staying under the same roof without any parental supervision. (Let's face it; the Pike parents do not give a fuck! They don't need to watch anyone  - they have a house full of qualified baby-sitters! That's probably the only reason they allowed them all to come up. They were probably like, "Hell yeah! We can go anywhere we want; we can probably just spend a couple days in Atlantic City and not have to worry about the kids cuz they're with all the members of the BSC!") They don't talk about sleeping arrangements (except that Mal and Jessi are in the yellow room that Stacey and Mary Anne used to room in), but I assume Logan was bunking with the Pike boys. 

So they're all driving up on Saturday, then the following Monday Logan is going back to Stoneybrook with Franklin and his kids (because he has to work on Tuesday....why did he just not ask for the rest of the week off? That's what I would have done...maybe he didn't have enough PTO!) Um...what is the point of going there? They have two full days (if that?). I looked up to see how far it is from Stamford to Atlantic City (I imagine Sea City to not be far from there) and it's three hours. I guess that's not too terrible, but I would add an extra hour because they talked about running into traffic near New York and that slowed them down. So you're traveling for eight hours just for a measly two days at the beach? If this was a four day weekend, I think that would be worth it, but just TWO days? No way...go when you have more time. 

Okay, let's talk about each member:

Has Hell frozen over? Because I think this is the first time Mallory actually gets an interesting storyline (and not, something like, getting bitten by bugs. I will never let that one go!) She also gets one of the better storylines out of all the characters. I am shocked, I tell you! Alex and Toby are there (they must live there because they are always conveniently in Sea City when the BSC girls are) and Mal notices Toby is flirting with her. She even narrates, "I liked the way he was making me feel. I'd never felt that way before." Geeze, what's Ben Hobart, then? Chopped liver? I was wondering why she wasn't even thinking of poor Ben Hobart, but he will come up later in the book. Also, we learn that Toby is fifteen? I could have sworn he was 13... But, eww, if he's 15 and macking on an eleven-year-old? That's straight up creepy, right? We will soon learn that Toby is a total creep. 

A BSC Super Special wouldn't be complete without an older member being a complete bitch to Mallory (in #6, it was Claudia; in #9, it was Mary Anne; in #8 it was all of them) and in this book, it's Stacey. She's jealous that Toby has his eye on Mal. In Mary Anne and Too Many Boys, Toby had broken up with Stacey. I didn't realize they dated; I thought they just had a summer fling. I don't remember them keeping a long-distance relationship when Stacey is in Stoneybrook. That never made any sense to me. Anyway, she is clearly jealous of Mal even though she's trying to act like she's over Toby. I'll discuss this more when I get to Stacey.

Mal takes a couple of her siblings to play putt-putt and she sees Toby there with a couple kids he's watching. They end all playing together and Toby is smiling and winking at Mal which makes her blush. She informs us since she has red hair and freckles, "I look like a ripe, hairy tomato when I blush." Lovely image there, Pike. Uh, I have red hair and freckles and I don't look like a "hairy tomato" when I blush. WTF? Toby asks her out for Friday, which is their last night in Sea City and Mal says yes. Again, why is a fifteen-year-old boy asking out an eleven-year-old girl? Creep-o city. She tells Jessi she's in love which seems very out of character for Mal. I can see Stacey doing that, but practical Mal? No. 

On the day of her big date, Jessi and Claudia go into town with her to help her pick out accessories for her outfit. They get barrettes in the shape of flamingoes "but cool, not corny-looking" as Mal is quick to tell us. She also buys the pins with faces of famous people such as Virginia Woolf, Jimi Hendrix, Stephen Hawking, and Janis Joplin. She says Claud picked them out because they were "funky" and didn't know who any of the people were. Now I want to know, did she not know who they were when she saw their image or did she still not know when Mal named them? Because that would be really sad. 

Her brothers tease her about the date, singing, "Mal and Toby sitting in tree, N-E-C-K-I-N-G. What? "Necking"? That's a version I've never heard of. What is this? The 1950s? (I feel like they called it "necking" in the '50s). Other than her dad telling her brother to stop with the teasing, her parents don't really contribute anything. I guess they're okay with their eleven-year-old daughter going out with a fifteen-year-old boy. But these are the Pike parents; they do not give a fuck. Remember, they let Mal wander around by herself at Disney World when she was ten. (Or was she eleven in that book? Well, whatever, still insane to let your kid do that). 

She's reminded of Ben and starts to feel guilty because she hasn't thought about him at all during her vacation. She calls Ben and we hear his Aussie accent (spelled phonetically for us) and they have a nice conversation and she realizes she doesn't want to date anyone other than Ben. Yeah, Mal, Ben is nice and Toby is a dickwad. She thinks about cancelling her date with Toby, but still decides to go on it just to spite Stacey when she hears Mal might not be going on the date. 

When Toby arrives, he greets her with "You look great, cutie!" and Mal just smiles at him. Ugh. That comment just makes my skin crawl. Ugh, just ugh. It also seems extremely patronizing. Even though Mallory loves the idea of making Stacey jealous, she still feels guilty about Ben and admits to Toby she has a boyfriend at home. Hmm, is this the first time she's referred to Ben as her boyfriend? Before he leaves, Toby tells her, "If you come back next summer and know of another cute girl who's unattached, let me know, okay?" Mallory will later get a letter from Toby (how did he get her address and why would he ask for it? Besides the point, I know) where he will write, "So I guess you wouldn't mind sending me the address of your friend Jessi? She seemed very nice. How old is she? Is she seeing someone?" Good God dude, what the hell is wrong with you? Someone is fickle with the ladies. Toby S-U-C-K-S. 

This is totally random, but Mallory writes a postcard to Mrs. McGill where she address her as Mrs. McGillicuddy. I realize it's a reference from I Love Lucy (because they tell us), but it's a little weird Mallory is writing a postcard to Stacey's mom (who has it going on - sorry, couldn't resist)! I know all her family and friends are in Sea City, but doesn't she have an uncle in a nursing home? Have we met him yet? 

Like I mentioned earlier, Stacey is jealous of the attention Toby is giving Mallory. Stacey, what did you see in that douche bag in the first place? I think it would have been more realistic for Stacey to be concerned that a fifteen-year-old is flirting with an eleven-year-old and try to tell Mallory she doesn't think that's such a great idea. Of course, Mal wouldn't like that, so you would still get the drama between them. She does apologize to Mal after Mal's date with Toby fizzles. 

Hurricane Bill is a big plot of the story and gets several chapters dedicated to it, including one from Stacey. They all plan to drive to the mainland to seek shelter, but the causeway has been flooded and they're directed to seek shelter at the elementary school up the hill along with everyone else who is stranded in Sea City. There are cots all set up in the gym and Dawn mentions it reminds her of the time of the SES sleepover (as in Dawn and the Big Sleepover). 

The back of the book gives us the description of Jessi being "Sea City's Super Sitter"...but that's not really a plot line. We only get two mentions of this. First, when she writes a letter to her cousin  about her upcoming trip and how she's going to be a helper for the Pikes, she writes, "I am going to be the best sitter they ever dreamed of!" We also get this narration from her:

Before long, the rest of the family was up. I, Super Sitter, went to work. I made pancakes, poured cereal, cleaned spills, and washed dishes.

"Jessi, you are amazing," Mrs Pike said at one point.

And that's pretty much the extent we get of Jessi being a "Super Sitter". And honestly, besides making pancakes, everything she listed is what a normal baby-sitter should do, anyway! Super Sitter, my ass, Jessi! Her real storyline really revolves around a sand castle competition. She's watching Margo, Claire, and Suzi when they come across a sign announcing the "First Annual Sea City Sand Castle Contest" (Really? Sea City has just decided to have their FIRST sand castle contest now?) and that "Anyone may enter" and there will be "Prizes in ALL categories!" The young girls are excited to enter and want to start practicing their sand castle building skills right away. Jessi sees adults working in teams and building these really extravagant medieval villages. Jessi is worried the girls are going to be disappointed when they inevitably won't win. But, wouldn't you think there would be age groups within this competition? And even if there is, that still wouldn't mean the girls would win. If Jessi had just warned them they might not win and explain about the adults with the amazing sand castles, I really don't think the girls would have cared. They would probably think, Well, of course they're going to be better at building sand castles than us. They're adults! However, Jessi is saved from having to do any of this when the competition has been cancelled due to the hurricane and Jessi claims that Bill is her hero. Okay, Jessi, you'd rather deal with a HURRICANE than seeing three girls be disappointed they didn't win some stupid sand castle competition. I mean, really!

The rest of the girls don't arrive at Sea City until the second week, so we hear about their adventures in Stoneybrook the first week. Mary Anne and Dawn are hosting a summer camp at their house for the kids they sit for. That sounds familiar! We get a Dawn-narrated chapter where they take the kids to the Stone farm to visit the goat and other animals and we get a Mary Anne-narrated chapter where they have a sleepover for the kids in the barn and Dawn tells a "spooky" story that scares Mary Anne the most (typical Mary Anne!)

When they get to Sea City, Dawn shares a room with Stacey who tells her what's going on with Mallory and Toby. Dawn is almost just as bad as Stacey about Mallory. She gives us this snide comment:

Neither of us could believe he's asked [Mallory] out on a date.

 Nice friends you got there, Mallory. It would be one thing if they were concerned about the age difference, but that never comes up. 

Mrs. Barrett and Mr. Harris-Dewitt are planning on taking the kids to Smithtown (which I believe is mentioned in Boy-Crazy Stacey), but the kids are bitching and moaning how they'd rather go to the circus which Dawn and Stacey take them too. Boy, Mrs. Barrett and her boyfriend dodged a bullet with that one. Now they get to enjoy a nice peaceful afternoon in a quaint town without seven whining kids! 

On the back cover summary of the book, it says, "Mary Anne shows Logan all the sites - the beach, the boardwalk, the infamous Tunnel of Luv." Which is all true...except for the Tunnel of Luv (why is it spelled that way, anyway?) which is mentioned as being closed for repairs. I guess whoever wrote the summary didn't even bother to READ the book which takes less than an hour to read! We get a couple chapters from Logan and he feels very insecure about Alex even though Alex has a girlfriend and it's been established that he and Mary Anne are perfectly happy being friends. Now if Toby had been going after Mary Anne, that would have been interesting! 

Kristy is trying to recruit kids to her softball team for an upcoming Krushers - Bashers game. She doesn't have enough players because everyone is either on vacation or at camp or, in the case of Jackie Rodowsky, injured. Lucky for Kristy, she still has all her five and four-year-old players and let's not forget the lone two-year-old player on her team! (Yes, that was sarcasm). You know, I have to wonder if AMM ever looks back at her books and wonders why she put certain things in, like, say, a two-year-old on a softball team. Because that has to be the DUMBEST thing I've seen in this series! 

Anyway, Kristy starts recruiting kids from her neighborhood and while she manages to get them to temporarily join her team, it's pretty clear none of these kids know how to play. It reminded me when she tries to recruit her classmates to participate in the cross-counting skiing competition in Baby-sitters' Winter Vacation. I just don't understand why they can't postpone the game. Is Bart really that insecure that the Krushers might win the game if they had all their original players. 

Unsurprisingly, the Krushers lose. I know, what a shock! We do get this amusing passage about one of the kids she recruited, who is super bougey:

Alexandra DeLonge had come dressed in a brand-new designer baseball outfit. She was trying desperately to wipe off a smudge of dust from her right ankle. In the stands, her parents and grandparents were having a champagne picnic and toasting each other.

There's some nice continuity in this chapter because there's a picture of Karen wearing her Crushers shirt while she's up at bat. That's right, it's with a "C" instead of with a "K" like Kristy and everyone else wears. I remember when Karen was having a hissy fit about that when Kristy first started the team and insisted her shirt be spelled the right way. 

When Kristy and the others arrive in Sea City, they have an impromptu BSC meeting in the Pikes' beach house kitchen just to chat and gossip and catch up on everything that's happened in the last week. I bring this up because we get this narration from Stacey:

Somehow Kristy had devised a way to convince the grown-ups to take the kids for a half hour. From five-thirty to six. Do you know why? You guessed it. A Baby-sitters Club meeting! 

 I find this absolulety mind-boggling. Are you telling me the parents of these kids can't watch their own damn kids for a measly thirty minutes; that they need Kristy to CONVINCE them to watch them? WTF? Are these girls expected to work 24/7 and only get two half hour breaks per day? Because that sure seems what it's like! 

Claudia finishes her last week of summer school before she heads out to Sea City. Ooh, riveting! She's made some new friends at summer school...friends who we will never see again. (Why even bother introducing new characters?) She even mentions that one of the girls, Carly, lives near her and she loves art as well and they've become good friends. Still, we will never hear from her again. Claudia, I know things didn't go so great with Ashley Wyeth, but you ARE allowed to have other friends besides the girls in the BSC! 

After the last day of summer school, Claudia reminisces with her new friends and they bring up memories. Apparently, one day, Claudia brought a VCR remote she thought was a calculator. Good Lord. I just can't. One of the girls is having an end-of-summer school barbecue on Sunday and invites everyone. Claudia is sad she can't go because she's leaving for Sea City on Saturday. She even considers taking the bus on Monday to Sea City so she can go to the barbecue, but then realizes she's been looking forward to Sea City for so long. At least Claudia writes a postcard to Carly when she's in Sea City. I was shocked she spelled Sea City right and didn't spell it like "C Sitty" or "See Sittee", then realized the postcard probably said "Sea City" on the front and that's why she was able to spell it right! 

 Let's talk about the cover for this book, shall we?:

I never know why they give Mallory the most fug glasses. They just cover her whole face. I like how Claudia is always the only one to wear earrings and other jewelry on the covers even though Stacey, Dawn, Mallory, and Jessi also all have pierce ears. Speaking of Stacey and Dawn, not entirely sure who is who here, but I assume Stacey is the one with the purple blouse, black skirt, and that HUGE gaping mouth. I have a joke here but it's quite distasteful, so I will not say anything! I do think it's funny that Kristy is looking at Stacey in amazement and probably thinking, "Damn!" I think Dawn has the cutest outfit (if that indeed is Dawn) with the white top and floral skirt. I notice that Kristy and Mary Anne are wearing watches. Wow, I haven't worn a watch in so long. They're not really relevant anymore, are they? I had a Winnie the Pooh one where his arms would move to tell you the time.

They Certainly Will Never Grow Up!

Disclaimer: My only Peter Pan knowledge comes from the 1991 Steven Spielberg-directed film, Hook.

It's time for BSC Super Special #9, Starring the Baby-sitters Club! This time instead of going on vacation or being involved in some kind of disaster (say, a shipwreck or a blizzard), this Super Special focuses on the production Stoneybrook Middle School is putting on of Peter Pan. I have qualms with this already. Even though SMS is putting on the play, tryouts are open to "all elementary, middle school, and high school students." WTF? Why not just have the local community theater put on this play? Look, I wasn't a theater kid in school, so maybe it works this way? Maybe a middle school puts on a play and high school and elementary kids are also allowed to be in the play? Somehow I doubt this. I just think this was a plot point to get some of the kids they baby-sit for in there. Like I said, why not just have the local Stoneybrook community theater put on the play and the girls learn about it and want to be in it? They will be performing the play three times: a dress rehearsal one afternoon for the students of SES, then two evening performances. 

My own knowledge of Peter Pan is pretty slim. If I've seen the Disney movie, it's been a very, very very, VERY long time. I've seen Hook several times and that's probably my best knowledge of the movie. I love the part where Maggie Smith, as older Wendy, exclaims, "Peter, you've become a pirate!" But Hook isn't Peter Pan; it's a story of what would happen if Peter Pan DID grow up. 

We get a few non-BSC members chapter POVs including Sam, Cokie Mason, and Jackie Rodowsky. 

The tagline on the back cover reads, "They'll never grow up!" Well considering they never age, that's certainly true!

Let's talk about the role (haha, get it? Role? Since they're putting on a play?) each girl plays in the book:

Jessi is the "host" of this Super Special. She has been chosen as the sixth-grade correspondent for the SMS Express, the school newspaper and she's gathering notes from her friends and other students about the play. I feel like Mallory would have been the more likely choice to be the sixth-grade correspondent. She's the one who loves to write! But I understand why they gave the book about a big production to Jessi. She is very excited about Peter Pan and pretty much tells everybody that she's going to play the lead even before auditions are held. Seriously, WTF? She's pretty egotistical in this one. I mean, I guess I can't blame her for thinking she's going to get the role of Peter Pan since I feel like she's pretty much the lead in all the productions her ballet school in Stamford puts on. I would have the same expectations if I were her! But...is there dancing in Peter Pan? I know there are songs, but I'm not sure about it having any dance numbers. 

Jessi tries out for the play along with the rest of Stoneybrook and feels good about her audition. At the end of the auditions, one of the teachers who's in charge of the play, Mr. Cheney (I wonder if he's related to Dick?), asks for a group of kids to stay behind including Dawn, Kristy, and Stacey. Dawn and Jessi have this exchange:

Dawn clutched at my elbow. "Is this good or bad, Jessi?" she squeaked. "He called my name. Is that good or bad?"

  "Oh, it's very good," I assured her. I smiled. "Mr. Cheney wants to see you again. It means you impressed him."

"Oh." Dawn smiled back, but then she frowned. "He didn't call your name, Jessi."

I patted her arm. "I know. Don't worry about it." Of course Mr. Cheney hadn't called my name. He'd already made up his mind about the role of Peter Pan. I left the auditorium feeling pleased and confident.

The fact that Jessi wasn't called back should have given her a clue. Much to her chagrin, Jessi does NOT get the part of Peter Pan. That role actually goes to Kristy which makes for an extremely awkward BSC meeting where Jessi refuses to talk to anybody. Jessi does get cast as a pirate, but refuses the role. I'm sorry, but she's acting like a brat. She does end up being the assistant choreographer since Mr. Cheney "needs someone to choreograph simple dances for the children." So I guess I answered my question about whether there are any dance numbers in Peter Pan. I'm just not sure how many of them involve the character of Peter Pan. 

The reason Jessi didn't get the lead is because she's already had a lot of starring roles in other productions and they wanted to let someone else get the chance to perform. I do understand that; let someone else have the spotlight. Mr. Cheney also points out that her acting and singing isn't any better than Kristy's, so they're both on the same level there. 

There is a huge spoiler on the cover. It shows Jessi wearing the crocodile costume, but as you're reading the book Jessi is talking about wanting to play Peter Pan, but then cast as a pirate, then ends up being a choreographer, so as you're reading the book for the first time, you're probably wondering why in the world Jessi is wearing the crocodile costume on the cover. Well, to be honest, I don't even remember what my thoughts on that were since it's been so long since I read this the first time! This book was published in nineteen hundred and ninety-two, for God's sake! You expect me to remember reading this for the first time? Pete Black is actually the one who is cast as the crocodile and Nana, the sheepdog. However, the day before the evening of their first performance, he has fallen off his bike and broken his nose.  Um, OUCH! I was expecting the sentence to end with saying that he broke his wrist or arm...I was not expecting his nose to get broken! Makes me wonder exactly what he was doing. For some reason, they have understudies for every single part...except for the animal roles. Jessi steps into these roles, thus why she's wearing the crocodile costume on the cover. Jessi is happy she got to be in the play after all. 

Ironically, Kristy wanted to play the animal roles so she got the role Jessi wanted and Jessi got the role(s) Kirsty wanted. Jackie Rodowsky, who we get a couple chapter POVs from, is scared of the crocodile costume, but once he finds out Jessi is going to be in the crocodile, he's totally cool with it. Gee, what was wrong with Pete Black? Jackie was cast as Michael Darling and he must be a good little actor because you'd think they wouldn't want to deal with a klutzy kid and give him a smaller role (thought maybe Michael isn't that big of a role? But considering that he plays one of the three Darling children, he must have a pretty good-sized role.) Also, we see a couple of Jackie's entries and while he does have some spelling mistakes (the kid IS seven after all), his spelling and penmanship is better than Claudia's, which is kind of sad...for Claudia. 

Here are a couple more tidbits from Jessi chapters that don't really have anything to do with the play, but I found interesting:

When Jessi and Mallory are walking out of SMS after school has ended, Jessi mentions how Mal "is always cold" (she is?) and says, "Mal, its like forty-five degrees or something." Now, if it were 55 degrees, then I would agree Mal acting so cold would be a bit overkill, but 45 degrees is pretty cold! Sure, it's not FREEZING, but the way Jessi says it, sounds like 45 degrees is balmy weather. You know Dawn wouldn't say it's warm weather! Maybe for the Connecticut crowd it would be nice weather! I definitely know that 45 degrees in Minnesota would practically be considered summer (okay, maybe I'm exaggerating...but not by much!) I don't know, I just thought that whole exchange was weird.

We also get this passage from Jessi:

Squirt suddenly decided "Pan" was his new favorite video, and he kept asking to watch it. By asking I mean that he would plant himself in front of the nearest grown-up at our house and say, "Pan, Pan, Pan, Pan, PAN!" until the grown-up dashed for the VCR in order to save his or her eardrums. 

Who wants to bet that Jessi is counting herself as one of the "grown-ups" in this paragraph? Also, I wonder which version of Peter Pan Squirt wants to watch? I'm assuming the Disney one.

Here is the cover with the costume spoiler. Because they're all wearing their costumes, I am able to tell Stacey and Dawn apart; yay! 

Like I mentioned earlier, Kristy gets the role of Peter Pan. Look, I understand this is a BSC book so I guess it makes sense one of the girls would have the lead and I guess Kristy makes the most sense....because she's short? As far as I know, she has never shown any interest in the theater or acting. But...you're telling me there's nobody at SMS who is a theater geek and would have loved to play the lead (not counting Jessi!) Kristy didn't even try out for Peter Pan and still gets the lead! Since she wanted to play the animal characters, the teacher director had her recite some of Pan's lines and I guess she just blew everyone out of the water so she ends up with the part. Kristy is fine in the part, but her big thing is she keeps forgetting her lines throughout rehearsals. During their first evening performance, Kristy forgets her first line, but Jessi prompts her from offstage and after that, she's totally fine. 

We need to talk about the Karen subplot here. Ugh, I hate that little brat. I thought she had her own chapters, but she doesn't. She wants to be Tinker Bell even though Tinker Bell isn't played by a real person. Obviously, because she's so small they just use lights and tinkling sounds to show that she's around. Sure, Julia Roberts played her in Hook, but when you're making a movie you can use force perspective to make people appear smaller on the screen. On the stage, if you see a seven-year-girl playing a tiny fairy, it's going to look fucking weird. Karen sure as hell doesn't understand this or just doesn't care. The director is trying to tell her this and this is the response we get from the little spawn:

"But I want to be Tink! I WANT TO WEAR A FAIRY PRINCESS COTUME! I WANT TO-"

 We get capital AND italicized letters in that last sentence. That's how you know she's really screaming and creating a scene and acting like an all-around champion bratty mcbrat-brat. Kristy is able to stop her tantrum for the time being. Even when she does her regular audition, she's all, "Want to see how I can be a fairy?" She will just not let it go. 

But then...in a later chapter after the play has been cast, Kristy tells the other girls this at a meeting of the BSC:

"Hey, I found out about Karen and Tinker Bell. I talked to Karen's mother this afternoon. She told me Mr. Cheney called and said he decided to make Tinker Bell an actual character after all. Maybe Karen's flitting around paid off. Anyway, I do think she'll make a good Tinker Bell. Put her in a fairy costume and she'll be thrilled."

So I guess the lesson is if you act like a total fucking spoiled brat, you'll get what you want, much like one Karen Brewer! Great lesson there! Also, Karen can dress in a fairy costume anytime she wants if she chooses...but why does it have to be at the expense of ruining a middle school play? Dawn wants to tweak a few things in the script and everybody is just aghast about that, but they're totally fine with a young girl playing a tiny, nearly invisible fairy. Give me a break! So do you think Watson called the school and threatened to take away any monetary donations he's offered them OR do you think he bribed Mr. Cheney? It's got to be one of those two. There's no way the teacher just decided to cast this brat in his play. He must haver been threatened or given an offer he couldn't refuse! Ooh, I feel like this would be a great one-off fanfic! 

So even though Satan's Mini-Me gets what she wants, she's STILL whining. She's mad because in the movie (again I assume they're talking about the Disney film), when Tinker Bell talks, there are lights that flash and tinkling noise. She has this exchange with Mary Anne, who is the "backstage baby-sitter":

"Why aren't there lights and tinkling for me?"

"Because in our play people can see you. Remember, you wanted to be a real fairy." 

"But I still can't talk. I don't have any lines. I WANT-"

Honestly, I'm surprised they didn't let Karen have any lines. Hell, I'm surprised they just didn't make Tinker Bell the main character since she always gets what she wants anyway. I'm sure if she screamed and cried and threw more tantrums, she could have made it happen!  

Stacey wants to be involved in the play and is happy to play any part. She ends up being cast as Mrs. Darling and Sam is cast as Mr. Darling. We get a couple chapters from his POV too. I'm only on book 35 in the regular series and this book takes place right before book 60, Mary Anne's Makeover. I know this because Mary Anne has long hair on the cover of this book and her hair is short on the cover of the next SS. Apparently, around this time Sam and Stacey are going out. I do NOT remember this at all. I remember there was a mutual attraction between them and I remember Sam was trying to get her attention in SS #8 (even before I re-read it), but I just never remember them dating. Sam tells the reader that a lot of his friends give him a hard time because he's dating Stacey and calls him cradle robber. Oof. You'd think with Stacey's New York cosmopolitan sophistication, she would be fifteen in small town years! You would think Sam's friends would be impressed the he could nab a sophisticated girl like Stacey even if she is two years younger. Sam doesn't want Stacey to meet his friends because he knows it will embarrass her if she knew about the jokes they made about her (about her needing a nap or a permission slip from her mom to go out, etc.). He thinks the play is a great way for his friends to see what a great time he and Stacey have together. (I'm pretty sure the only reason the ghostwriter allowed high schools students in the middle school play was to be able to have Sam involved; besides him, the only other high schooler mentioned is the guy who plays Captain Hook). Sam still manages to embarrass Stacey by calling her "my darling Mrs. Darling", which personally, I think is hilarious. I don't think that's embarrassing. Now, when he calls her "Mother", (because Mr. and Mrs. Darling call each other "Mother" and "Father" in the play which is super weird), I can understand her being embarrassed by that! 

Anyway, they talk and hash everything out and everything is fine between them. 

Dawn tries out for Tiger Lily and ends up with the part of Wendy. They make a big deal about how FANTASTIC Dawn was in her audition and she got the part of Wendy because she was that good and not because she looks like Wendy. Cokie Mason also tries out for Tiger Lily and is very good in her audition too. She's cast as Tiger Lily and wants to gloat about how she beat Dawn for the role, then realizes Dawn was cast in a bigger role. I have no idea who Tiger Lily is; she wasn't in Hook, so that's probably why I don't remember her character. 

So I mentioned earlier that Dawn wants to tweak a few things in the script. She thinks the play is sexist, and well, she's not wrong. As she tells Mary Anne, Peter Pan has "some nerve" and only wants Wendy to come with him to Neverland because "He just wants someone who will cook and clean and sew for him." All Dawn wants to do is change a few lines and have Wendy teach Peter how to sew on his shadow or how to cook. Seriously, if they're willing to let a child play Tinker Bell, why not throw Dawn a bone and let her have this? I wish Dawn had pointed that out. Sometimes Dawn can be a bit...extra, but I do see her point on this one. I don't think it would be that big of a deal if they have Wendy teaching Peter how to sew his shadow back on. 

At their rehearsals, Dawn keeps changing the lines which doesn't help Kristy who is already having trouble remembering her line. Finally, Dawn realizes it's just a play and there's nothing she can do, so she just reads the lines as is. 

She doesn't tell her dad about the play because she doesn't want him to feel bad about missing it, which is pretty sad. Richard video tapes the play so they're able to send him a copy of it and Dawn says that her dad cried when he watched it which is sweet. 

Mallory is the apprentice costume designer which makes me scratch my head. Since when has Mallory been interested in making clothes? I think this would have been better suited for Mary Anne; doesn't she like to sew? Anyway, Mallory is helping an 8th grader named Savannah and they're both working with the home-ec teacher. I'm confused. So you're telling me there are only three people making all the costumes (well, all except for the animal costumes which are rented from a costume shop in Stamford). 

Mallory is embarrassed because she has to measure a few of the actors and she's mortified she has to measure boys. I don't blame her; that would be extremely awkward, especially for an eleven year old. I would hate that job because I hate being in people's personal space and I also would be worried I would get the measurements wrong and all the costumes would be too big/too small. Mal gets a list of the people she needs to measure and they include Dawn, Jackie, Karen, Alan Gray, Cokie Mason, and Lucas Danver. Lucas is the "most gorgeous guy at the high school" (according to Dawn) and he's playing Captain Hook. She's able to measure the first three without any problems but is worried about the latter three because she knows Alan is going to embarrass her, Cokie is going to be a bitch, and she's too intimidated to measure Lucas. She manages to weasel her way out of measuring those three, though. 

Some of her storyline ties in with Mary Anne's which we'll talk about next.

Mary Anne gets the title of "backstage baby-sitter" because she's baby-sitting for the Braddocks and accompanies them to a rehearsal. She ends up helping and assisting any kid who needs help or assisting and Mr. Cheney notices this and asks her to come to every rehearsal and watch the kids. 

There's this really stupid part where Mary Anne is afraid to go with Haley and Matt backstage because she thinks she will end up in the play. WTF? Like Mary Anne, I also have stage fight and would never want to be in a play, but I have never been afraid to go backstage and I know that doesn't mean I'm going to end up being onstage! Sometimes I think Mary Anne is too sensitive. 

Mary Anne gets pissed at Mal (poor Mal; I feel like everybody always gets mad at her in the SSs) because Mallory starts taking over her job and is all, "Let me do my job!" I'm sorry, but I think Mary Anne is being a bit bitchy here. You would think she would appreciate the help. At the time she explodes at Mal (Mal tells us she was not quiet when she says that), there are three different issues going on with the kids. There's also at least twenty kids in this cast. Chill the fuck out, Mary Anne, and appreciate Mallory's help. Mallory really does get the shaft in these SSs, doesn't she? 

Claudia is basically a non-entity in this. So much in fact that there's a scene where she's in her bedroom talking to the portrait of Mimi about the play. It's a sweet scene, but it also makes me think they couldn't think of anything to write for the Claud chapters so they just threw that in there. 

Not surprisingly, Claud is creating the backdrop scenery for the play. There's a little subplot where she's worried something is going to happen and a piece of scenery will fall off and hit somebody in the head, but of course, nothing of the sort happens. 

Cokie Mason is a bitch to both Claud and Mal. She tells Mal that she better make her look good and she tells Claud that if anything goes wrong, she's going to blame it on her. I think the ghost writer forgot what job Claudia had because in the following chapter, Claudia is thinking about what Cokie said and she internally narrates, "What did she mean, I better make her look good?" Um, she said that to Mal! 

Oh, yeah, Logan also narrates a chapter. He plays a pirate named Noodler and he's super embarrassed about his name. Get over it, Logan. He also gets kicked out of the play because he keeps fooling around with Alan Gray and the other pirates, but he gets back in the next chapter. Way to keep the suspense there! Jessi throws some serious shade on Logan when he auditions: 

I have to tell you that Logan's audition had not gone too well. He spoke his lines in a loud, flat monotone, barely pausing at commas or periods. He seemed to have forgotten the purpose of punctuation. His singing had not been much better.

I'm guessing his character has no lines; he sounds absolutely awful at acting! Jessi gave him a massive burn with that! 

To end this review, here is my favorite line from Hook: